1. Potato chips

They say if you cook with your heart, the food does wonders to your body. Potato chips were invented with a feeling of spite against a dissatisfied customer. No wonder its harmful effects have seeped in over the years. Rich in trans fat, this seemingly light piece of wafer can wreak havoc in your system.

2. Aerated drinks

Some kid in some Godforsaken part of the world stored his milk tooth in soda. And soon after his tooth went missing just like the soda cans from my fridge. Mom has apparently banned soda at home. I’m still searching for this moronic kid.

3. Ketchup

Just one tablespoon of commercially prepared ketchup typically contains four grams of sugar, which is a lot going by researchers. Some even say, that to lead a healthy life, avoid ketchup altogether. Yeah right! Talk to the hand, researchers! Nobody moves my ketchup from the table.

4. Donut

Don’t be fooled by the cuteness and the happy colours of these pretty little donuts. Made with the unhealthy trinity of – trans fat, sugar and refined flour, these savouries can screw you up in the long run. But it’s okay. I’m ready to be screwed. Come to me, baby. Do-nut go away.

5. Fried food

No points for guessing why McDonald’s calls its meals ‘happy meals’. Fries can make anybody happy. Haters say when you’re scoffing down those greasy fries, you’re actually shuttling in unhealthy fat into you. Fine! I’d rather die of a fat overload than being denied my share of fries. Or samosas.

6. Muffins

Even the beefiest of stud muffins can fall prey to the humble muffin. Packed with an insanely high sugar content, these tiny little cute things are laced with preservatives that enhance their shelf life. If you don’t take them home with you, they can literally sit there till the end of time.

7. Microwave popcorn

Apart from a tablet of Crocin, what else comes in handy when you are dragged into a movie theatre running a Rohit Shetty film? Bingo! A tub of popcorn. And now you tell me that popcorn has some sort of trans fat in it? What shit? Is there anything I can enjoy in peace?

8. Bacon

‘An excess of anything is bad.’ Whoever came up with this line had probably wolfed down loads of bacon and suffered a minor heart-stroke. Having this tasty treat once in a while is okay but devouring it daily would spell disaster for your heart, thanks to its crazy amounts of nitrites and nitrates.

9. Processed meats

Processed meats are those that are preserved by smoking, curing, salting, or by adding chemical preservatives. Adding processed meat to your diet can lead to carcinogenic changes in the body due to their high saturated fat and cholesterol levels.

10. Energy drinks

Red Bull gives you wings. I’m not sure of that but it would most likely give you elevated blood pressure and heart rate due to stimulants like guarana, that have caffeine-like effects along with caffeine itself. No wonder I can’t sleep once I have an energy drink. Too much caffeine swimming in my blood stream I suppose.

11. Frozen meals

In today’s world it’s easy for you to order frozen meals from the store, heat it and gulp it down. Saves you a hell lot of time without compromising on taste. So good. But your body might not say the thing because these frozen meals have sodium content that often surpass the recommended maximum daily dosage of 2300 mg of sodium. Delete the store’s number right now.

12. Smoothies

So you shifted from having a cheeseburger to a glass full of smoothie for breakfast in a bid to cut down those calories? Too bad you miscalculated. If a glass filled with extreme portions of fruits, vegetables and syrups whipped together in a blender doesn’t make you realise that the calories have gone into overkill mode, then I don’t know what will. Just take a full long look at her and you’ll know what I mean.

13. Sugary cereals

These foods that claim to be healthy are actually big time offenders. These morning munchies have sugar that might not be that good for your system. If you don’t end your love affair with sugary cereals soon, then there’s no way you are getting back into that pair of college jeans again.

14. Packaged fruit juice

What wrong can packaged fruit juice do to you? Well, a lot, because most of the time you are guzzling down artificial sweetener. And even if you are downing juice made from actual fruit, you are just injecting crazy amounts sugar into your system and missing out on the real deal – the fiber.

15. Mayonnaise

The next time you slather your bread with mayonnaise, make sure to hit the gym and burn those extra calories that you’d be packing in yourself. An occasional spoonful of mayonnaise is actually good for you but who stops at just one?

Have you tossed that bowl of popcorn out of the window yet?