13 Really Fucked-Up Toys You Will Be Glad You Never Got To Play With

Children are like clay. Easy to mold, easy to spoil. Therefore we are extremely careful about what our children learn, what company they stay in and what kind of toys they play with. Having said that, humans are weird. We do weird things, and we don’t even spare the little ones when it comes to offensive, abrasive and stupid ideas.

Here are some of the weirdest toys from all over the world that could leave a hideous scar on an otherwise innocent childhood.

1. Amputee dolls that come with accessories like wheelchairs

A toy amputee that can be sewed back together. These beautiful dolls come with accessories like doll wheelchairs, prosthetic limbs, arm braces, walkers, Swiss therapy balls and what not! I say, this is the right way to teach your kid empathy! Go for it!|

2. Pregnant doll

It’s common belief that these dolls were created to educate Japanese women about child delivery. However one cannot deny their entertainment value. Right?

3. Shocking Roulette

Shocking roulette is a fun, four player game where each player inserts their index finger in a slot and each round’s loser gets a painful shock! Painful, but so much fun!

4. Pee & Poo

Stuff toys that look like a pile of shit, aimed at toilet training kids. I don’t know how well that’s going to work, if your kids fall in love with their excreta and won’t let it go. Anyway, beautiful and innovative attempt at toilet training.

5. Inflatable Toast

Don’t you love it when you have a toy that reminds you of your favorite food that you can’t have? Presenting, inflatable toast. Just blow it up, look at it, salivate, and taste disappointment. Sweet, isn’t it?

6. Batman Squirt Gun

As if Batman didn’t have enough weapons you envy already, he became a weapon himself! Just fill up his posterior with water, and watch him spit on the enemy. Fighting crime was never so exciting!

7. Kaba Kick: Practice shooting yourself in the face

If your kid has got a thing for violence, don’t let him miss out on the Japanese version of ‘Russian Roulette’, made for kids who can’t wait for a real gun to try out the actual lethal version.

8. The Teenaged Zombie

A really convincing zombie figurine that looks really disgusting and oozes pus and bodily fluids when pressed. Perfect toy for your princess.

9. Yume: The Injection Doll

This Japanese doll serves a very useful purpose of teaching your kid what to do when injected. On injecting it with water, it trickles down from the eyes as tear drops.