A Thank You Note For My Cheating Ex-Boyfriend

Dear the-one-who-was-meant-to-be,I’m not going to start this one with ‘I still love you’. Nor am I going to ask you to ‘come back’.

I’m not saying that it’s all over between us. It really isn’t. There are still some things that have been left unsaid.

I’m sure you still think of me. Very sure.

If nothing else, you probably remember that wonderful day we met for the last time. Fabulous, wasn’t it?

You. Me. Her. Yeah, I’m sure we could have arranged a less awkward meeting. But it happened the way it did.

I know you’re probably thinking that I have terrible things to say to you after I found you and her (nothing against her though) snogging so affectionately. It was aww-ful.

But the fact is that well… I don’t. I’m just writing in to thank you. Yeah, you read that right.

I thank you for introducing me to self-preservation. It’s not that I won’t trust anyone, it’s just that I would do it more deliberately now.

I thank you for giving me a chance at a guilt-free break up. Phew.

I thank you for personal space. I needn’t tolerate farts or reply to a text because I’ve ‘last seen at 1:20’. I feel…

I owe you a BIG thanks for letting me discover myself again. I’ve been on 4 great dates so far and I’m in no hurry to settle for any.

You made me introspect and I realised that I can really be with someone MUCH better. Myself.

While I’m at it, I should also probably express my immense gratitude for your timing. I was thinking of buying you an (e)Xbox for your birthday. You saved me A LOT of money.

Also, thanks dear ex-love for that gorgeous dress you sent me as an ‘apology’. Accepted. I’ll wear it to my next date.

I thank you for taking the plus one tag off of me. Sometimes my friends really hated having you around all the time.

And a final thanks for lying the way you did. *Claps* Showed your real face to me.

I’ve also reserved a special message for her. I’m sure she’s a nice person, but she’ll need a lot of patience to be with you. Tell her she can call me, anytime.

Don’t worry about me. I’ll amble along just fine. It’s you who needs to live with the guilt, and without my awesomeness.

Good luck. And have a great life ahead.

Hugs.

Warm regards,

Angry young woman no more

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