It is no news that break-ups suck butt pretty much across the board. And as much as we associate the idea of a break-up with the image of a crying woman, binge-eating ice-cream and refusing to get out of sweatpants, the reality is actually slightly different.
Turns out guys might have been misunderstand all along when it comes to failed romances – they’re hurting too. It fact, they’re hurting more than women are. Studies reveal that men are more sensitive to the end of a relationship than the world gives them credit for.
It was found by sociology scholars at the University College of London upon surveying 5,707 men and women from 96 different countries about their behaviour surrounding breakups, that while women have a network of close friends and family to fall back on in the case of a break-up, men often lack this social support system.
For most men, a romantic partner is the only person the confide in and therefore are left grossly vulnerable when that is taken away.
“Young men don’t tend to confide in each other and that can make them feel isolated. Their friendship groups are more competitive than nurturing.”
While it may not be outwardly visible – on account of men trying to appear ‘strong’ or ‘cool’ – the loss of a person to fall back on can throw young men’s identity and self-worth for a toss. Hence the undeniable role of alcohol and drugs in helping men try and process their feelings.
So while women heal through expressing their emotions, men are often more likely to find a friend in intoxication.
Not only this, but according to the survey, while men found rocky and broken relationships more stressful than women they were also more likely to reap greater emotional benefits from an ongoing happy romance.
So, being in a fulfilling non-marital romantic relationship has actually been observed to enhance emotional well-being more among men than women.
I believe it’s time we collectively put an end to the myth that men aren’t as emotional as women. They feel every bit of love and pain that comes with a relationship – if you don’t believe me, talk to science.