She is my strength.
She is my support system.
She is the constant I want in my life.
She is my mother. But she is not my best friend.
And I think that’s okay.
The relationship between a mother and child comes in many forms. It doesn’t necessarily need to be that of BFFs.
Mind you, this in no way takes away the beauty of the bond, its uniqueness and speciality.
In fact, the relationship children share with their mothers may be one of the most complex in this world. It is intimate yet fraught with challenges.
It is very basic, yet different.
It is complex, yet special.
While many people think that mothers who befriend their children are ‘cool’ and all, for me it’s the sense of safety and belonging that makes our bond special.
I remember asking my mom once, “sabki mummy unki best friend bhi hoti hai, aap mere friend kyun nahi ho?”
She just said, “Kyunki main mummy hoon“.
Years later, I realised that I don’t even want her to be my best friend. She’s so much more than that.
She still scolds me when I break rules. She corrects me when I go wrong. She cheers me up when I’m sad. She comforts me when I’m unwell.
Every relationship is unique and I think the term ‘best friend’ doesn’t even compare to the bond that I share with my mom.
It’s good if you find a friend in your mother. But don’t force it on her, if you do not.
Let her be the mom, she is. And love her for that.
Growing up, my mom was never the ‘cool’ mom. She was not my best friend. She still isn’t. She was the mom I needed and I’ll always cherish to have.
And I’m so, so glad for that.