Inappropriately-timed boners are the bane of a man’s existence – they’re embarrassing, they’re unexpected, and they make family dinners hella awkward. But what if there was a magic off-switch to this rising issue? What if your magic wand was the problem all along? Reddit, as usual, came to the rescue, with this thread about how to quickly send your blood rushing somewhere else.
1. “Hold your breath.” – yougoddangfool
2. “Hiding it in the boxer strap.” – yeet_ffs69
3. “Put my arms behind my head for a big stretch. The body gets the message about redirecting blood flow quite quickly. – theyusedthelamppost
4. “Flex your thighs or muscles in your arm for a minute or two.” – CubingB
5. “If you’re sitting, lift your legs ever so slightly off the ground. Like only a quarter of an inch. And hold them there.” – NedPlimpton-Zissou
6. “Turn 40.” – BruThrowaway19
7. “Sing the chorus to Free Will by RUSH.” – KingSudrapul
8. “Picture it getting cut by a knife and start bleeding. Instant boner-gone material.” – ihatepickingnames37
9. “Think about my life.” – KoreaRiceBox
10. “Think about family :)” – 4JLF
11. “Hand in the freezer will do it real quick.” – Scottbrio
12. “Try mental math.” – OmarSigma
And if all else fails, go to the hospital.
All GIFs from Tenor.
