If you ever happen to meet anyone who has any experience in the wild or deals with wild animals, they will tell you the animal they fear the most is not an apex predator. It’s a hippo. They all fear hippos. See, hippos are herbivores. But they don’t like being f**ked with. If the crocodiles that share their home with them could tell you what bullies they are, they would. And if the hippos found out the crocs have been talking shit about them, they would slap their heads for fun.
Now, if you managed to read through the first paragraph, I believe I have painted a very accurate picture of why you shouldn’t mess with hippos. They will literally bite your head off and not even eat it.
So, when I came across this video from, what people are referring to as Delhi zoo, I watched it with dread.
A hippo that had managed to sneak out of its penn was slapped a bunch of times by a security guard.
Redditors have since been going crazy looking at the video.
Yeah they look cute but in reality they are among the most dangerous animal on earth.
-ArsyX
This hippo looked like it was fucking around a bit.
-morgasm657
You just gota slap them back.
-ollyofhousefuckwit
Had a buddy in college who was from S. Africa. I asked him once if he was ever scared of getting eaten by lions and he said no…but I’m absolutely terrified of hippos. My ignorant ass thought he was joking.
Holy christ. Can you even imagine being able to say you fucking slapped a hippo, multiple times? I wonder if he has any idea how unbelievably dangerous that was. If we were playing the worst game of Would you Rather and my choices were this or Russian Roulette….that would be kind of an easy decision.
-Omateido
About 500 people a year are killed by hippos in Africa. They are not cuddly.
-TinBoatDude
The people behind him don’t understand how much a hippo is dangerous: these animals are fast despite their weigh, they can run faster than a human and with a single bite they can tear you apart.
-Krakenofclubs
Also Children’s media makes them come off as bumbling but cute herbivores. Why the fuck would we lie to children like that.
-OneMetalMan
I think this guy must either be trained on Hippo submission or his balls are clanging.
-Liontamer67
I read a poem in a children’s book when I was little and I’ve had a healthy fear of them ever since. “Don’t fall in, Don’t fall in To the hippos grin. The hippos grin Is not so funny Once seen inside A hippos tummy.”
-princess_skate_7
Don’t mention how they can spray shit out off their ass-sprinkler.
-Revolutionary-Tree18
Yeah but does the guard? Like he walks by and “omg surprise hippo, I know I’ll give him a little smack on da face, that will take care of him” That thing was an actual hungry hungry hippo Super cute flippy ears though when he decided not to eat the guard.
-zepoopsmith
Man, I bet this hippo is blasted off his keister on serious hippo drugs, top-of-the-line hippo narcotics to keep his hippo ass guzzling back pond water and algae peacefully. edit: downvotes? Africa’s third-deadliest and most territorially aggressive animal being held, and you think he isn’t drugged tf up? You think this zoo keeps the hippo happy with herbivore pellets and alfalfa sprouts, and that’s why it has dropped the natural tendency to charge anything in its territory and destroy the invader with the #5 strongest jaws on the planet? Sorry you didn’t like to read this, downvoters, but that hippo isn’t gaping around in catatonia because it’s really happy with all the alfalfa
-CountWubbula
Look, the comments are funny and the video is amazing because nobody’s died or dismembered beyond recognition but don’t fall for it. If you ever see a hippo, firstly, where the F are you and second, RUN!
