It was the kind of relationship that's written about in books.
Fighting all odds, in an almost serendipitous manner, they met and it was love at first sight. Ripe as a mango in the sweltering heat, their love blossomed like a rose on a bright spring afternoon.
They were perfect, you could say but that's such a boring way to describe a couple. More like truly, madly, deeply in love, maybe?
But the end was near.
One fateful evening, they decided to call it off. Shattered hearts, broken emotions. It was over! And just like it happens in the movies, they sat by the window, staring into oblivion.
Whose fault was it? Did he fall out of love or did she give up on them? Frankly, it doesn't matter!
Why blame yourself for the end of a relationship? You gave it your all, right? Sometimes, just sometimes, it's not your fault!
Not just relationships but even break-ups have long been romanticized!
You can't just part ways, shed a few tears and move on. You have to spends months analyzing what worked and what didn't and spend many drunken nights blaming yourself for it.
"It was my fault. Maybe I wasn't good enough!"
No, it wasn't your fault. And yes, you were good enough. Actually, you were better.
"Why does it always happen with me? Maybe I'm doing something wrong?"
Well, for starters, a relationship is not a job and there's no 'right' way of doing anything. And secondly, it happens with everyone and not just you.
Can we all stop this blatant self-blaming every time we break up?
Yes, a relationship is about two people and two sets of emotions but just because it ended, doesn't mean that one of them has to take the blame.
Just like there are a lot of things that make a relationship, it takes a lot of them to break one too.
Sometimes, you outgrow the relationship. Sometimes, it's the other person. And other times, the love simply fades away. It doesn't always have to be someone doing something specific for it to end.
And just because your relationship didn't work out, it's not a warning sign for you to wake up, smell the coffee and take stock of your life.
We have to stop playing the victim. We have to stop believing that we did something that lead to the break-up. We have to stop blaming ourselves.
Your relationship didn't work out, yes, but it doesn't mean that you need to change.
Often, two amazing people don't make an amazing life together. And sometimes, a beautiful love develops between not-so-perfect human beings.
Life is unpredictable. And so is love.
If you're coping with heartbreak, make sure to not blame yourself. No point being so harsh on yourself because some things are just not meant to be!