We have a very bittersweet relationship with our parents, especially desi parents. Sweet, because they always look out for us and care for us no matter what.
Bitter because sometimes our parents forget that we are also growing into our own individual selves and get to have a say.
From boundaries to making one's own decisions, there are a few things that some Indian parents find very difficult to understand about their kids. And, it's not just me, we found a Quora thread on it.
1. "All they (parents) care about is what relatives say. My parents still don't understand my pain. They don't understand that I am suffering from depression." - Anonymous
2. "They need to realize their decisions can be wrong also and can ruin their children's future. Sometimes to give a chance to their son/daughter to choose their career and a life partner is not wrong." - Mohit Agrawal
3. "How is having anxiety issues my fault? Do you think I don't try to avoid them?" - Anonymous
4. "Why do you make it a big deal that I shouldn't have a lock on phone or when a male's name that you don't know appears in contacts?" - Anonymous
5. "They don’t realize that their child even as an independent adult, seeks their approval." - Apollo432
6. "I wish you’d let me exercise my choice when it mattered. I wish you hadn’t made me make stupid promises about not talking to girls, when they were actually interested in talking to me." - Priyanka Bharadwaj
7. "Why are you defending your children when they have done something wrong?" - Radha Mahadevan
8. "You should teach your son to respect his mother and his sister. You yourself should respect your wife and daughter." - Radha Mahadevan
9. "Your parents never understand your dreams." - Kshitij
10. "Indians parents don't understand if their kids want to be alone, it means they want some privacy which you should respect." - Supriya
11. "Parents also have to understand that today's world is different than theirs." - Supriya
12. "I am tired working from Monday to Friday and then attending class on Sunday. The only day I can relax and wake up late is Saturday. Why don’t they understand that waking up late one day will not ruin your life? Why is it so hard to see their kids relax for a day?
13. "I do not want to get married by 23, give birth to babies a year after, go for 9–5 job, and continue the cycle of life. It’s normal to dream a little out of the box. Why is it so hard for them to understand this?" - Anu Krishnan
14. "I am born and bought up in Hyderabad and my relatives are based out of Kerala. I talk to them occasionally and they are my mom's sisters and brothers. I am not close to them at all and how can she expect me to be in touch with them every time?" - Anu Krishnan
15. "Dressing comfortably makes sense to oneself. Why should we wear clothes that doesn’t support the climate to please another person’s eye?" - Anu Krishnan
16. "What Indian parents don't understand is the space their children need . They wouldn't understand sometimes it's okay to let their children do what they wish." -
17. "Indian parents don’t understand that evil lie in mind of an individual and not in religion one follows or caste one belongs to." - Anonymous
18. "Standing out of crowd is not something stupid, it is indeed a brave decision which their children are willing to undergo and (parents) should be proud of it and lend their support because there is no other support system for them except for parents themselves. - Rohaan Ghazi
19. "The problem with many (not all) Indian parents is that they want their children to fly but they don't let them open their wings. They don't understand that their child can go forward only if they don't hold them back." - Saksham Kumar
20. "Every parent must understand the feelings of children." - Chetan Chougule
21. "I could not clear JEE with a decent rank. But I got an exceptionally good rank in AIEEE, letting me get into any good college and any branch I wanted to. But parents were still unhappy. They felt ashamed because of me." - Anonymous
22. "How can you assure that some rich guy will keep your daughter happy and a poor couldn't? - Mohit Agrawal
23. "This is me wanting to tell you, PLEASE DON'T PLAN MY LIFE. I've been blessed with my own brain. I'm tired of the emotional drama and traditional lectures." - Anonymous
24. "When I was 10 years old, I wanted to go to dance class. But my mother thinks dance is not for decent people. So instead, I was sent to learn Carnatic Music. I tried my best, but I hated it. It was not something I wanted, it was something I must learn as a Tamilian Brahmin. - Shanaya Agrawal
25. " It's high time they start believing in their children's potential than to forcefully pressure them into doing something which they have no interest in." - Kaarthick Subramanian
26. "Engineering, medical and chartered accountant are not the only professions in today's world. All these are saturated now. Let the child do what he or she wants. Believe in them." - Kaarthick Subramanian
Now it's up to us to show them where they are going wrong and show them the right path.