There are times we all settle for less, we compromise. And there isn’t anything wrong with compromising, unless you’re doing it all or most of the time! For instance, this Reddit thread where women have shared when they realized they were settling for less.
In most of these confessions, there is a huge imbalance in how much they’ve compromised.
Here, take a look at what these women have said:
1. “When I was lonely more than I was happy.”
2. “When I was supporting the person mentally by playing therapist and asking questions for him in my therapy sessions even though I was begging for him to go to therapy since he got arrested the year before. When I realized I did most, if not all, of the emotional labor because he was dealing with his mental health and he’d vent to me but when I needed him it started to become ‘too heavy’ for him to listen to. When I was paying 50/50 in all bills and paying him back when I had to borrow money even though he made way more than me, and he acknowledged that I paid a higher percentage of my income for our household. When I realized I did all of the cleaning and he called me controlling for wanting a clean home, so when I stopped cleaning the house was infested with trash and flies but ‘the house needs to be lived in.’ When I realized that we were together for nearly three years but I was being irrational for wanting a marriage timeline.”
3. “When I used to feel a sense of joy in traffic jams because that means I’d take longer to get back home to him.”
4. “When he started making loud gag noises and spat out his hot dog directly at the table we were sitting at because the hot dog guy forgot he didn’t want ketchup. Our friends were sitting at the same table, all eating. And then he started pouting because he was hungry but couldn’t eat his hot dog, and he didn’t want to ask the hot dog guy to remake it. And no, he wasn’t 3 years old. I wanted the earth to swallow me whole.”
– Miqapuff
5. “When I was so unhappy that I cried almost every time we spent time together.”
6. “I cried a lot. I felt unheard and unseen.”
7. “When we moved in and he wouldn’t even clean up a dirty plate that sat on his bedside table for a month. I’m not interested in mothering a grown adult.”
8. “When I miscarried and he told me to get over it. Only a month after it happened. Meanwhile he refused to get a job, help around the house, and just be respectful. As soon as he told me he didn’t love me anymore. I packed everything immediately and said, ‘Bye, fucker!'”
9. “Even when we were together I felt alone. When he started treating me more like a maid, than a partner.“
10. ” When I thought I was asexual or a lesbian because all I knew was sex under coercion which never felt pleasurable.”
11. “When we went to Italy for vacation, and all he wanted to do was stay in the hotel and watch Netflix.”
12. “When I realized that my ‘feminist’ partner who believes in women’s rights, also wants a live in maid, cook and mother, instead of putting in his share of the work.”
What a wake up call all of these sound like!
