Depression is discreet and it demands internalization.
That’s the reason why it is tough to tell if someone is suffering from the disease, let alone the magnitude or seriousness of it.
So, then, how are you supposed to act around a person suffering from depression?
Unfortunately, there is no specific answer to that question and the story of this woman from Mumbai is just about that.
In a post shared by Humans of Bombay, she told that she was best friends with a person since she was 14 and while he was an introvert, she had always been an extrovert.
Everything seemed fine until one day, he decided to leave for San Francisco without telling her.
He never told me he was leaving for San Francisco for a year, until he reached the airport. I rushed there and begged him to stay. But he left for some water and never returned. I waited for 2 hours. He called me from the plane and said that he had to leave–he was terrible at goodbyes.
This must have been tough for her but a year later, when he suddenly turned up at her office and apologized, she forgave him.
But then, it was time for him to go again- and this time- for good.
I was 22, when he told me he was leaving for abroad again. He wasn’t coming back. He said this time would be different and that he wanted to spend his last month in India with me. We did everything together and even picked out gifts for his friends. I even threw him a farewell party.
She didn’t hear from him after that, but didn’t initiate a conversation thinking he had always been a silent one.
She didn’t know that an unpleasant surprise was waiting for her.
After 8 months, I bumped into his brother – I felt odd at his cold attitude. When he realised I didn’t know, he told me that my friend had committed suicide… He then gave me the password to his email, saying that there were letters for me. The letters said that he loved me, but held no explanation for his actions.
This hit her bad and she couldn’t stop blaming herself for everything. She’d feel guilty of not doing enough and it led to her cutting off from getting close to people.
But then one day she was talking to a friend who was suffering from depression and it changed everything.
Recently, I tried talking to a friend who was depressed. He told me, ‘I know you’re trying to do what’s best for me, but I don’t deserve this. Leave me alone. I’m a fuck up.’ All those memories resurfaced. I cried for days and finally, opened up to my sister. ‘It’s not your fault’, these 4 words began healing me. After all these years, I was able to accept that my best friend was really gone.
The post ended with the words:
I now know – a little bit of help can go a long way.