I’m 28 years old.

Unfortunately, not 28 years ‘wise’. Just 28 years old. 

Having lived more than a quarter of life, I’ve had my share of learnings. Most of them being anecdotal. I’ve known the effort that goes behind cracking a forced smile, I’ve known how easily friends can become strangers and I’ve also known the duality of intentions. 

However, you know what the biggest learning of my life has been so far?

That I was a much better person as a kid.

I’m not a monster now but I’m not as clear-hearted as I used to be.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a monster now. All I’m saying is that I’m not as clear-hearted I used to be as a kid. I’m not half as carefree. And I’m definitely not as selfless as I used to be.

I’ve traded all those attributes for a much mature, worldly outlook. But now, I realize that I’ve made a really bad bargain.

As a kid, it was much easier for me to forgive and forget. 

I’ve realized that I never used to hold grudges as a kid. That it was so much easier for me to forgive and to forget. I had my peace of mind intact. Simply because I never felt the need to mince my words. 

I cared much less about what others thought of me and that in turn, made me a much simpler, happier person. 

I still speak my mind out but it’s a calculated risk now. The ‘no-holds-barred’ old me seems to have lost somewhere today.

Yes, we were nasty as kids. But we were never scheming. 

As adults, we forget what a promise means, what commitment means and above all, what it means to do something selflessly. 

As kids, we might’ve been evil, mean and nasty at times. But we were never scheming. We weren’t cunning. We never used to let our egos dictate our relationships and vested interests never planned our friendships. 

Too bad all of us grew up. But none of us grew wiser. 

Remember how they used to say ‘never grow up, it’s trap’? Guess they were right. Too bad none of us listened.