It’s never going to be easy to answer why someone cheated on you. Being in a relationship comes with lots of ups and downs, but if someone genuinely wants to be with you, they won’t f*uck it up. It takes love, trust, honesty, loyalty, and security to make a relationship work. While losing any one of it ruins everything else.
One cannot justify cheating as it is a choice they made and gave up on their relationship. People who have cheated on their partners have some reasons, and most of them are appalling.
1. “Drugs, miscommunication, lust, and then after, post nut clarity is a bitch. The guilt will eat you alive. You don’t know why you do it really, other than animal instinct. But then you hate yourself after it.”
2. “I cheated on my first wife repeatedly out of anger, frustration, immaturity, and a whole host of other reasons. Then my wife died of cancer. Now I spend every day living with guilt and shame which is 100 times worse than anything that happened before. Never again.”
3. “We were drifting away from each other. We hadn’t seen each other in a month. Just started college, and meet the woman I would marry. We talked right after it happened, she said she had done the same thing a week prior, we were pretty much broken up at this point anyway. Mutually assured destruction I guess.”
4. “According to my ex, he cheated on me because I had other boyfriends before him and he felt insecure and wanted to see if he had the ability to get other girls even though I “was his soulmate” lmao”
5. “I had just gotten out of a relationship where I was cheated on. I didn’t know I was cheating honestly – I was doing it emotionally with my ex after entering a relationship with my current wife. I denied that’s what it was when caught but eventually realised I had been unfaithful in the heart. I regret it every day. My wife is a beautiful and kind soul and has forgiven me, but sometimes she remembers it and I can see the pain and anger resurface.”
6. “Because I was a narcissist insecure asshole. I’m in treatment now. It’s a bit late for me but better late than never. Almost 50.”
7. “I thought at the time the only thing wrong in the relationship was just that the sex was bad. Afterward, I realized a lot of what made the sex bad was a lack of attraction and poor communication. Broke up with her and never cheated again.”
8. “Cheater here. Cheated probably a dozen or so times and admitted to each one before I was caught. I did it because I was unhappy with my relationship. She had cheated on me a few times, was massively inappropriate with a few guys, treated me terribly, and used me for my money. I grew up abused and shit so it seemed normal to be unhappy when I cared about someone. Eventually, I snapped. I found women who were damaged and in my same scenario and things blossomed. Some I connected with sexually, which is surprisingly rare for me. Others enjoyed my hobbies or showed me new and exciting things. Then a few just matched my mentality so perfectly that I wanted to spend all my free time talking to them. It wasn’t always about sex or physically cheating, it was about being fulfilled in areas I felt lacking.”
9. “My husband cheated on me with escorts for a year. After we had our daughter obviously it was harder to have sex, although my sex drive has always been bigger than his. We slept in separate rooms as he works in a hospital and needed his sleep. He blames that for cheating on me. He wouldn’t have even told me if I hadn’t snooped on his spare phone and found out. Even after that, he went there. He said it is because he missed having fun and it was a stress release.”
10. “I don’t have a reason at all, honestly. When I think about it, I can’t even begin to fathom why I did it– I honestly chalk it up most of the time to the fact that I was 16 and he was in university, away from me (not an excuse, just how my stupid teenage self felt).”
11. “I was a serial cheater from my teens to my early 20s. To me, it was all for the thrill and ego boost. It was fun and exciting doing something I knew I wasn’t supposed to, especially with a new sexual partner. It bloated my ego to astronomical proportions. I remember feeling like some type of rockstar because I had “hoes”. I even challenged myself to see how many girls I could sleep with within a single day. Thankfully I matured and realized what an asshole I had been. It’s been 8 years since I last cheated.”
12. “I cheated a long time ago on a man I really loved. I knew he wasn’t the one but we had a great time together. I told him at one point that I wanted to try being with another man at the same time. He wasn’t dominant enough for me; in fact, he was very vanilla but good in bed nonetheless. I was also manic. He told me no. So I cheated. I didn’t feel good about it. I was also dating a girl, but he was okay with that part. Eventually, I just realized I’m not made for monogamy.”
13. “Not currently cheating because I got my shit together. I cheated because I’m a gay woman. It took me an embarrassingly long time to realize it. I got married to a great guy but we obviously had no sexual chemistry. I was starved for intimacy and was starting to feel like I was going insane. Cheating was wrong but it helped me make the biggest realization of my life. I’m happier and he’s happier.”
14. “Not enough sex, things started off great but after a while, the sex was happening less and less often. It got to the point when once every 2 weeks would be considered a good month. I tried being more romantic, taking her out more, tried to be more direct and flirty but nothing worked. She is content having sex only once or twice a month. So yeah I have brief affairs to get the satisfaction I am constantly denied at home.”
15. “Because it made me feel like someone actually wanted me and I could be myself without worrying about criticism. I still love my wife but she has control and anger issues that I didn’t realize when we got married. Being one of those always right kinds of people she can be hard to talk to and isn’t receptive to the idea of counseling. That doesn’t excuse my own actions but there it is.”
Read more: People Reveal The Dumbest Excuses Their Partner Gave For Cheating.