She called me up at 2 am. I picked it up because it hadn’t happened in a while. And anyway, wasn’t she supposed to be traveling? Turns out, she’d come back earlier than expected. Not one to ponder much, I asked. 

“I just couldn’t take it anymore. We’re poles apart from each other. It can never work out!“

The other half of the ‘we’ was her boyfriend, of course. The one she’d been dating for about 6 months. The one she’d felt was perfect for her. The one she’d gone holidaying with. 

The one she dumped on a holiday and came back. 

What wrong could’ve happened at a beach resort in Maldives, right? Apparently, they were just not compatible enough. Not enough to take a holiday together at least. And that was just not acceptable to her.

Yes, there is such a thing as compatible enough for a holiday. If you’ve wondered whether the person you’re dating is worth the long haul, the best way to find out is certainly taking a trip together.

If a couple can survive a holiday together, it can survive anything in the world!

There’s something about a holiday that brings out our most basic, naked self. 

Waking up late, having an extra cup of coffee and lying around in messy, almost-there clothing, a holiday is when we really do what we actually want to do. There’s no everyday discipline, no mundane chores we hate doing but have to. We’re not rushing to get ready to head to work, not trying to eat healthy and work out regularly and not making an effort to look our best for both work and post-work scenes. 

Basically, we’re our most normal, natural self. Something we’re not when we’re living in the city, going about our lives. 

We’re not trying to do anything. Not looking at impressing anyone. Not our boss. Not our colleagues. Not our friends. Not even our love interests. 

A holiday is where our true instincts come out. And therefore, it’s the best way to find out if our instincts gel well with those of our partner’s. 

It’s the same with even friendship.

Sitting at bars, downing shots by the dozen, it’s easy to maintain vows of friendship. Everyone decides to meet at a common place and comes dressed to the dime. There’s not much scope to chat as the music has overtaken every conversation. All you need to do is exchange pleasantries, click selfies and have a good time. 

The only time you really chat with a friend is over phone. Or rather, on WhatsApp. Even here, since both parties are in their comfort zones without each other, it’s easy to have a heart to heart. You don’t have to put up with someone’s quirks and deal with their mess, literally. 

Naturally, we all love our friends. We love them till we take a holiday with them.

Because on a holiday, you’re with them 24×7. No going home. No Netflix. Nothing. Just you and your friends, stuck on a remote island, unknown city or something like that. 

Will you guys run out of conversation? That’s what will decide just how good you are as friends! 

Chilling with someone is different than living with someone. 

No, this is isn’t about live-in relationships. It’s about really, actually spending time with someone. That kind of time that isn’t divided between work, family and friends. The kind of time that isn’t running out fast enough. 

The kind where you’re just with your partner or friend. Where there is no where else to go. No one else to talk to. Nothing else to do. Focused, undivided, singularly-attentive time. 

The sort that truly tests your bond. 

Because while living in different places in the city, it’s easy to pretend, you can’t really do that when you’re together on a vacation. 

There’s a reason why, after a certain age, we start hating family holidays, right? Because there’s a lot we can’t do in front of our parents!

A holiday may seem relaxing but brings out the beast in all of us.

Firstly, there’s tons and tons of planning. From tickets to stay, there’s so much that needs to be sorted. Finding a cheap enough flight and a decent hotel can drive even the most sanest of people crazy. 

Then, there’s the bit about planning the itinerary. He wants to relax by the beach but she’s in the mood for tasting local cuisine. She wants to shop but he’d rather go drink. She’s interested in adventure sports but he wants to visit the museum. Getting the drift? 

Lastly, you are sharing a room. Two people in one room. One bed. One bathroom. Don’t let the movies fool you coz it’s nothing like it’s shown on the big screen. Especially if you’ve never shared a closed space with a member of the opposite (or, same) sex before. Think toilet seat-woes, figuring out the side of the bed, trying to get the air conditioning to a mutually agreed-upon temperature etc, etc. 

Basically, it’s a mess. A big, giant mess. Relaxation, anyone?

In an era where relationships are about ‘likes’ and selfies, it’s easy to believe you’ve got it sorted. 

Chatting on apps, flirting on DMs and going for dates meticulously planned on social media, couples enjoy quite a convenient life. It’s all good because at the end of the day, there’s only so much time you can spend with someone, right? 

Unfortunately, when you’re traveling with your partner or best friend, time is never the problem. It’s too much of time together that becomes the problem.

You’ve got to see their unpolished personalities and tolerate their most ridiculous quirks. 

If he burps or farts, you’ll know. If she snores at night, you’ll know. If the toilet seat is not up, you’ll find out. If he’s not into food as much as you are, it’ll be a problem. If she doesn’t care for the beach and is a mountain person instead, you’ll have to plan accordingly. 

When you’re going for a trip with someone, there’s way too much of adjustment. And unfortunately, that adjustment isn’t always pleasant. Or, easy.

We all have various relationships in life. 

There’s our partner. There’s our family. And there are also our friends. Each solve a different purpose. Each of them have a different place in our life. 

But if you think about it, how many of them would you like to go for a trip with? Or rather, how of many of them can you go for a holiday with?

If you don’t have an answer, a holiday will indeed answer your questions!