What is sexism? Well, the idea is that you are bracketing somebody as ‘inferior’ or ‘unworthy’ on the basis of their sex or gender. Sexism creates a dichotomy between men and women, associating certain roles or traits as feminine and masculine. It propagates the idea that one sex is superior to another.
The problem is layered. Since gender-based sexist ideology has trickled down for centuries, it has been internalized by both men and women. This means that while more and more people are getting aware of its evil presence, they don’t even realize when they are being sexist.
People assume that a type of behavior is ‘normal’ just because it has existed for the longest time. It would be hard to deny that women experience casual sexism on a day-to-day basis. Here are 18 examples from everyday reality for men to identify if they are being sexist.
1. If you believe women can’t be better drivers.
We know how to drive. Stop panicking at every other turn. It’s demotivating and super undermining. That judgmental look in your eyes from your car beside us, it reaches us. We can sense it. It’s suffocating.
2. If you think a woman needs a man to take good care of herself.
A woman raised you. So another woman surely does not need your gracious presence to fend for herself, especially when she is independent.
3. In a work environment, if you do not let your woman colleague present her ideas. Or you cut her sentences mid-way.
Sexism at work place is very common. If you see somebody perpetuating the same, please call them out.
4. Every time you need somebody to get you a coffee in office, you look at a woman.
Women colleagues are not your assistant, stop treating them like one.
5. If you think women can’t be good leaders.
Statistically, you’re wrong.
6. If you think certain jobs are ‘suitable’ for women while others are not.
This division is based on stereotypes. World doesn’t need it. Women don’t need it.
7. If you ask young boys around you to not cry because “boys don’t cry.”
Both men and women can cry. Crying is a normal human expression of emotion.
8. If you don’t call out blatantly sexist remarks men around you are making.
Seriously. If you know something is messed up, just call it out.
8. If you think certain clothes are ‘not suitable’ for women.
Freedom of choice is a human right. Stop sexualizing clothing.
9. After coming home from work, you expect your wife or mother or sister to cook meal for you. Or even wash your laundry every time.
It’s not just a woman’s job. Share the load of household chores.
10. In your office, if you refer men with their names and women as ‘girls.’
It is very irritating. It reflects that you’re undermining their intellect.
11. If you think women ‘should not’ drink or smoke while you do it yourself.
What’s wrong? It is our choice.
12. If you think sexism doesn’t exist.
It does and it’s everywhere.
13. If you think it is weird for a woman to have certain interests that are otherwise associated with men only. Like ‘football,’ ‘cars,’ ‘bikes’ et cetera.
14. If the only time you’re talking about the plight that men face is when a woman is sharing her experiences.
It is not a competition.
15. If the only reason you denied having a woman as your personal trainer at gym is because she is a woman.
If she is a certified trainer, she is pretty good at her job. Don’t assume.
16. If your idea of insult is “stop being a girl.”
This is so messed up. And it begins right from the childhood itself. At the very beginning, impressionable minds are nurtured to think in terms of gender binary.
17. If you are selling something to a man and a woman (like a house, a car etc.) and you’re only talking to the man even though the woman is clearly the prime decision maker.
This is so common. At restaurants, at car show rooms, while buying a house. Everywhere.
18. If your idea of compliment is “you’re not like most girls.”
It is so not a compliment. It is not even remotely romantic. You are literally reducing the worth of an entire gender by saying something like this.
It goes without saying, if you think you propagate sexism in any way, please stop.