The ‘traditional’ institution of marriage springs from misogyny, patriarchy, and gender roles. It’s transactional and performative, where women are almost always treated inferior to men. Husbands are deified as super-humans while women are reduced to mere puppets in the hands of their male counterparts even as the ironic world joins hands to pray to a woman Goddess.
Today, the dowry system is hoodwinked. In many desi marriages, it operates under the garb of ‘giving gifts,’ as the bride’s family invests lakhs into a fancy wedding, in contrast to the groom’s family which operates on a ‘pay as you like’ policy without anybody raising an eyebrow.
A lawyer on Twitter (@meghamehta8488) has called society critiquing ‘modern’ Indian women wanting to live away from in-laws. In a detailed thread, she has brought out how the saas-bahu drama is a real thing, especially in the context of Indian households where marriage becomes ‘a loss-making enterprise for women.’
The superficial beauty standards, the widow-bane syndrome, and the apparent lewd male family members have been known to come out of fiction to shadow a woman’s life in the context of desi marriages.
Case in point: Mothers.
If not yours, perhaps somebody else’s around you. Chilling stories are out there; all one needs to do is strip the garb of delusion.
It’s easier to call out the world before rectifying what’s flawed from within. We all have an idea of a ‘perfect family’ and ‘happily ever after’ so deeply ingrained in our system that we readily cast off even the slightest bit of roadblock to stick to that idea. Cos that’s what sustains us; our idea of the ‘perfect family.’ Hard-truths?
So many women have related to this thread on Twitter that it’s almost chilling.
Financial Independence is so important that it can’t be stressed enough.
Is there any such thing as ‘the perfect marriage’ when it’s not a union of two equals?
Read more: Women Are Sharing How They Broke Stereotypes Within Their Family And It’s So Empowering
