It’s hard not to surrender when you know you’re going to have a pleasurable climax. You wouldn’t want to miss that orgasm because it’s so much fun at that moment. There’s no perfect guide for lovemaking, and things can go haywire when you’re horny. But here are some biggest mistakes you shouldn’t make- even in that heat of the moment.
1. “When I was 13 I used toothpaste as lube, it started with a nice warm tingle but soon evolved into the worst cock burning I’ve ever experienced.”
2. “Driving around with my girlfriend. She told me to pull over somewhere. We found a nice long dirt road that we thought no one would drive by. Turns out we were on private property and the owner of the land pulled up in a truck and caught us and said he was gonna report us after screaming at us. Luckily nothing happened afterwards.”
3.” Sexted an ex of mine who had been very abusive, and who I had previously cut contact with. Getting back out of that one wasn’t fun.”
4.” Covered my ENTIRE body in Vic’s Vapor Rub. The tingling felt pretty damn good at first, but after a few minutes became incredibly uncomfortable. No worries I’ll just hop in the shower and clean it off. Well Before doing this I had been doing some ass play in the shower for a long time so the hot water was completely depleted. I only had ice-cold water to get this shit off of me with.”
5.” I did give my beloved childhood teddy bear a facial though. When the post-nut clarity hit I just sat cross-legged on the floor looking at the hot mess of semen and fur I created. Ended up cleaning him VIA waterboarding but the stains never disappeared.”
6.” Young me discovered the electric toothbrush.. and started the using the actual brush part of it on my cl*t…. I used the same toothbrush to brush my teeth only rinsing it before and kept it until it broke about a year later. I look back and realise how disgusting that is.”
7.” Took a girl home from work. She offered to blow me for the inconvenience. I said sure. With my dick in her mouth, I got a text “Hey can you stop fucking my GF? Thanks.” Got the fuck out of there real quick.”
8.” Self facial, didn’t try just shot on my face. Wasn’t fun, I respect women more now I know what a facial is like.”
9. “A girl and I was chasing each other for over a year. When one of us was single, the other was not. finally, we were both single and hooked up. We were having sex in her room, her roommate was there. She worked at 8 pm, so she got dressed and left. Her roommate crawled into bed, and I had sex with her. The next day it was over.”
10.” Got pregnant…….. Stupidly got super excited and told my husband to cum inside me and Christmas Eve turned into a very expensive present 9 months later.”
11. “My guy was working his magic, making me quiver and see stars. I was so wound up, I asked for anal despite his size and lack of prep. Great sex ends with an anal fissure and blood everywhere.“
12. “Was trying to get with a girl in college. We were texting and I asked her what she was up to, she said she was training for a marathon and going to the gym and asked if I wanted to come. I ended up running 9 miles before I tagged out. So now I know how far I’d go to get laid, it’s up to 9 miles.”
13. “I decided to wank around 9 pm on a weekday. It made me sleepy, I fell asleep, missed the deadline for a programming assignment, and sent my previous A average to a C-.”
14. “Got a drunken under-the-scratchy-blanket handjob on an international flight from a girl I had been drinking wine with. it was awesome…until we landed and my parents, who had been sitting one row up and across the aisle, let me know that we hadn’t been as sneaky as we thought we were.”
15. “Finally broke up with an overly attached psycho, like six weeks later she goes to pick up some stuff at my place, we pick up stuff if you catch my drift and I wasted another year and a half trying to get out of that mess.”
Read more: Here’s A Month-By-Month Sex Bucket For 2023 To Keep Things Wild.