How many times have you asked a woman out in the restaurant by penning your thoughts on a piece of tissue paper?

Ushering in a total paradigm shift are bill receipts, which are the new means of communication. Here are 30 of them for you to enjoy. Some are funny, some are sweet, while a few would totally elicit a WTF.

Discount for having "the best butt"!

Source: Unbelievable

There's a price to pay for letting one rip!

Source: Funny Receipts

"Extra wet"

Source: Viral Circus

The waitress talked about her Italian roots. What she received must have left her totally flabbergasted! Way to go!

Source: Seenox

The best way to ask out a waitress!

Source: The FW

Having a tan pays!

Source: The FW

Cola Wars explained.

Source: TheFW

Because God > Tip

Source: Eater

Having babies who don't wail saves you money too!

Source: TheFW

Sweet gesture...

Source: Crnobelo

Legit poetry!

Source: Meme Collection

When the tip is bigger than the bill.

Source: Mental Floss

Who would foot this bill?

Source: 780Tuners

When tipping is math!

Source: TheFW

Everyone knows what you came her for.

Source: Wackyy

Come on, don't be mean to stoners!

Source: Answers

And to fat women.

Source: BuzzFeed

GooGoo Sprm anyone?

Indian Jew?

Source: Funny Receipts

Dayummmn!

Source: Funny Receipts

Not everyone can math tho.

Source: Piximus

Coke and dick?

Source: Funny Receipts

Everybody was birthday tippinggggggggg...

Source: Break Room Stories

The sweetest "Thank You" note!

Source: Blogspot

Passing the baton.

Source: Vlaad

This is honestly sweet.

Source: Volucia

Funnily harsh!

Source: Bossip

Damn, this N-word man was broke!

Source: M!

Serving clients with a P-p-p-poker face!

Source: TheFW

Turn me on with your garlic bread...

Source: TheFW