First of all, stop being such a feminist.

Feminism does not advocate equality of the sexes.

It advocates that you are a bitch.

Stop saying how you feel.

Stop screaming that it hurts. Just take it, bitch.

Stop being such a girl all the time.

Source: favim

Yes, I used the G word. The highest insult there is.

Are you going to cry about this

or man up and deal with it?

Source: favim

Listen, he does not like you hairy down there.

So shave up real good.

But dammit, you are taking too long!

You don’t want to be late

Source: datingguide

Hurry up, do it quickly!

Don’t worry about the razor cuts, you have a date!

Oh no, he is here already. Apologize.

Source: www.samanthalifson.com

Laugh, when his friend smirks at him,“Women, huh?”

Be yourself but don’t be too you.

Don’t be offended. Laugh

Be the girl he is proud to have.

Source: shein

But most important of all,

Stop complaining.

There are certain things that he likes; accept it.

Source: talesofbebu.tumblr

He likes to watch the game,

hang out with his homies once in a while.

Also, the occasional appreciation

for the hottie at the bar.

Remember, it is okay.

But make sure you don’t like to shop a lot.

You don’t want to fit the stereotype, girl!

Source: hersuccess

Make sure you- like- don’t-like-talk, I mean, like this.

Ditch the red lipstick. Don’t try to look too pretty.

Pretty means dumb.

Source: thethriftpop

So what if he does not remember your anniversary?

Don’t nag him about it.

Look down and smile when he says to you, before leaving,
“Bros before hos.”

Don’t start crying like a girl, ho.

This poem (which is obviously sarcastic) was written by Kavita Sarmah. You can follow her work here.

Masthead Image source: maryrowen