Technology has changed too much.
Not necessarily in a bad way but it sure has flipped our lives around. People are now cool with orchestrating their lives on the internet. Everything can be done at the click of a button.
But finding a partner - a walking, talking, breathing human being that I might have a shot at being happy with (for however much time) - cannot be found on an application downloaded by a gazillion other people scattered across the world.
It doesn’t strike me as an exciting idea, at least not in my old school, stubborn, boring head.
I’ll get straight to the point to establish my perspective.
If you ask me it just feels too impersonal and kind of desperate.
I mean, no offence to all those who’ve found whatever they were looking for on Tinder and other similar match-making tech wonders, but I was just never comfortable with putting myself out there to a bunch of strangers who might or might not want to make a bid on me.
Is this community looking for love? Sex? Time pass? Kinky kicks?
Why am I caught in the middle of so many needs? Do I really wish to be pursued by completely unknown people, many of whom are posers behind masks?
Even if I were to get down to it, could swiping left or right take me cruising down the road called Waiting to a man well suited for me amongst the collective eligible population of the planet?
Are our stars mating somewhere within a glorious galaxy in cyber space?
Will I finally find him floating somewhere in a sea of digital profiles?
Maybe, maybe not. But that’s not the point. The point is that I’d rather not try my luck here.
Honestly, I think the whole concept is superficial as f**k.
Here, I find myself staring at someone’s best photographs, trying to analyse his persona by the brief, vague stuff mentioned in the ‘bio’ section. For me, bios are strictly reserved for job-hunting, not man-hunting.
So yeah, no Shaadi.com or Match.com for me either. Perhaps I’ll reevaluate my opinion if I wake up a cougar someday.
Then there’s the major ‘creep’ factor part. There are stalkers and delusional loafers who just won’t stop chasing you. And they form the majority; we all know it.
Imagine if we tried to find real friends on Facebook by sending requests to total strangers based on the scant information shared by them. Because hey, I want a new friend!
That would be pretty weird, right?
All the bizarre ‘romantic’ messages I get via other social media outlets are scarring enough. I don’t want the same shit happening elsewhere. How do I even know what I’m getting into? All my interaction is limited to a screen.
Sure, I could meet the person, but that takes time. I can’t have an all-nighter conversation and fix a date for the next day. Nope. Nah. No way. I value my time as way too precious to waste it so randomly.
Hypothetically, even if I were to play the game, when I do finally meet the guy, there is every possibility in the world that he turns out to be an obsessed, psychotic, probably neurotic freak just waiting to torture his next victim. That would suck.
Thank you very much. I’m out.
Also, how are people dealing with so many options?! While talking to even two people at the same time can get taxing, these apps are a different ballgame all together. They could make a player out of an innocent fool.
Taking an average number of matches a fairly decent person is bound to get, leads to a lot of people up for shortlisting.
The moment I start warming up to one, there’s a brand new star attraction on the scene. A guy who looks like a Greek god and plays the saxophone is now trumping the nerdy, smartass I’d been thinking about. Then comes along another, then a few more.
Wouldn’t that be so exhausting after a while? I’m getting tired just thinking about it.
Anyhow, let’s say I exchange numbers with whoever seems interesting till I’m juggling multiple conversations. The chats get longer till I inevitably call one guy by the name of another. That could totally happen.
This will inevitably result in an incredible amount of confusion and I’ll be lost after a while.
I take 30 minutes deciding dessert. Picking a guy will definitely take longer.
How would you even choose?! Listening to the heart might be one way to go about it but we all know how wrong our hearts can be.
Unless you’re looking to get laid: a plain, no-fuss, no-nonsense hook-up. That sounds absolutely fine, and very convenient. Just so you know, I wouldn’t use these services for even booty calls.
I think no string attached, one-night stands were coming along just fine for everyone even before this genius invention was conceived.
On top of it all, it doesn’t help that I know too many cases of jilted, disappointed and troubled friends whose false hopes clashed with reality too often. I won’t pin my expectations on the same.
I know we don’t have enough time to go out and meet people organically. And building a rapport of any kind takes too long. Which is why such apps started trending so much.
But I still couldn’t do it. I know friends who are in healthy relationships with partners they found on Tinder. They’re happy. No one died or went crazy. So I know it can work. Even for me.
But guess I’ll never know. And I’m more than okay with that.
The opinions expressed in this article are the author's own and do not reflect those of ScoopWhoop.