If you are a fan of Gobi Manchurian, this article will most definitely offend you. 

Source: YouTube

And you will be okay with it because a lot of people like me also get offended when we have to eat it.

Source: Tenor

And stop saying it ain't that bad. 3.6 Rontgen wasn't that bad. 

Source: Independent

Why is there a Gobi Manchurian anyway? Whose idea was it? I mean, it tastes the exact same as the gravy of a chicken Manchurian, except with no chicken in it. 

The Russians use it as lunch in their Gulags to torture prisoners. 

Source: Imgur

No, don't Google that. For God's sake, they are Russians, not monsters!

Source: Giphy

Hey, don't get me wrong. I actually like gobi.

Source: Gfycat

But if you are cooking Gobi, it should look like this

Source: Eating Well

Or even this. We would eat the hell out of this Aaloo Gobi.

Source: Heartbeats

I would rather torture myself watching MS Dhoni's run out in the semi-final than eat Gobi Manchurian. 

If you are eating in from a little stall on the side of the road, it's crap served in a cheap plastic plate. If you are eating at a fancy restaurant, it's still crap served on a fancy looking plate and then you have to pay service tax!

Source: Wikipedia

Gobi Manchurian is a fish out of water. 

Actually, scratch that. A fish out of water, if cooked properly tastes good. 

Ain't nobody want to that! I mean, you wouldn't like chicken in your rajma, right? Yeah, I don't want Gobi in my fucking Manchurian, man!

Source: Giphy

Get a hint. Stop making that shit.