For many people, Bollywood is more then just entertainment; it becomes a way of life. They live their lives according to what they watch their favourite actors do in movies and try to fit movie plots into their destiny. Sure, there are lessons one could possibly learn from Bollywood. But for every one of them, there are plenty that one should entirely avoid applying in real life.
If these are the lessons you have picked up from Bollywood, unlearn them right away:
1. You can stalk your way to someone’s heart
In reality, if you do that, you’ll be beaten up by the girl, her father, her brothers, her uncles and her neighbours. AND the police.
2. Start singing and dancing randomly and expect people to join you
It won’t really be an offence if you start singing and dancing randomly on the streets, but would you like it when people throw stones at you?
3. Never confess your love to her, because she’ll run to you if you play hard-to-get
When you don’t tell the person you love about your feelings in time, they’ll just find someone else. And you’ll end up like Karishma Kapoor from Dil Toh Pagal Hai.
4. You can ‘Inky Pinky Ponky’ your way out of diffusing a bomb
5. You can tame a wild tiger with a slap
DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME. If you do, make a video.
6. You can teleport to foreign lands if you have the right ingredients: a lover, designer clothes and a song to dance to
Um.. Chandni Chowk to Egypt. How much will it cost you? A song and a lover!
7. Dancing atop a train is so much fun
If you enjoy a painful death, sure.
8. You can defy the laws of Physics, Maths, and the Universe
If you jump from a helicopter to shower your lady love with roses, without any safety measures, you will die.
9. It is okay to love a terrorist, till the time you die with them
No, if you suspect someone, you don’t pledge to die with them. Report them to the police. Otherwise Sunny Deol will come after you.
10. Marrying random strangers is cool
The wedding being arranged is one thing, but the wedding being arranged the day before the wedding is.. weird.
11. Pretending to be gay, to win a girl is absolutely okay
What? Why? And well, even if you do, you’ll never find a lady love… because, well, you’re gay.
12. If you don’t get a kick from your current job, steal priceless things
No. You change your job.
13. The best way to escape from your kidnapper’s lair is to seduce him by bathing in the sea
Take a bow Bollywood. *slow clap*