Besides “Where do you see yourself in the next 5 years,” if there’s any question that is more difficult to answer, it’s this one— “Beta, Kitna kamate ho?”
We haven’t been able to come up with a viable response to this question usually posed by nosy relatives yet. Now, some Reddit users are suggesting that one shouldn’t discuss their actual salary with their parents as well.
The conversation started after one of the users recounted his experience telling his parents about his monthly salary. And, according to the Redditor, they eventually ended up making a lot of financial decisions for him.
Here’s what fellow Reddit users had to say about the dilemma.
1. “Nobody knows my salary except my manager. In fact, most people think my salary is 50% of the actual amount. And yes, for the first year, when everyone knew it, they tried to dictate. I didn’t comply. So people call me selfish.”
2. “More like LPT for dysfunctional families. Yep, it’s a sad reality that most Indian families think they own you. Like what? Yeah, do whatever you feel is right for you.”
3. “Totally agree. I recently rejected a marriage proposal from a family that was demanding that I show pay slips upfront. They just don’t have trust.”
4. “It reminds me of a guy who works for me; he has his salary paid into two bank accounts. The first one gets the salary that he started with 3 years ago, the second has every increment and allowance. I think this post explains why.”
5. “My parents, as well as my in-laws, know exactly how much I earn as well as how much and where my investments are. But we have this incredible concept that a lot of people are not aware of; it is called “boundaries”. Yes, people close to me are definitely allowed to advise and comment on my financials if they find something odd, but I alone decide where my money goes.”
6. “If someone asks me about my salary, I just tell them the base component. It’s like 40% of my total income, so even if I was made to spend it all, my savings rate would be 60%. Pretty thrifty, huh?”
7. “I can vouch for this. I recently disclosed my salary to my parents, and they have spread it to my relatives like wildfire. Never expect your family/relatives to understand how the corporate world and your finances work. They’ll simply have a different set of expectations and opinions about you.”
8. “I don’t talk about salary with my family as I earn more than almost all of them. I don’t want it to become an issue where they know exactly how much I make. I told my friend my salary when I first started, but haven’t updated him since then. It has the potential to drive a wedge in the friendship, and I decided against sharing it later on.”
9. “My parents are the same way. They’re constantly asking about my salary, my bonus, and even the content of my performance reviews. It’s like my worth as a person is somehow tied to my job performance or compensation. Invasive is a good word for it.”
10. “I say nothing. You end up non-verbally committing yourself to a lot when you make these things public. I come from a strange family.”
11. “In some cases, lying is essential. Being truthful is not going to help everyone. Lying about money doesn’t mean they’d lie about everything else. Regarding lifestyle, shopping—tell them you got that on sale; travel—tell them you got a discount. These things are manageable.”
12. “The actual LPT here is to not let anyone tell you how to spend your money.”
We wish we could just flick a magic wand and disappear, next time someone asks us this uncomfortable question.