Show me someone who says they’ve never watched porn and I’ll show you a liar. We all have, at some point of time or the other, intentionally or unintentionally, seen at least a snippet of that-which-must-not-be-named and spent some ‘quality time’ with ourselves in the process.
Just like Popeye. And all of us used to think it was the ‘spinach’.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_51039123.png)
However, even though it’s extremely common, there are some who are disgusted beyond words by the mere idea of playing with themselves.
This article is a wet dream for such people. Check it out.
1. Move your jaws, not your hands.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_138175395.jpg)
Why chew it when you can rub it?
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_241125027.jpg)
2. Bahut khujli hai na tujhe?
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_511435276.jpg)
Don’t worry, it’s a sex toy. Not a very appealing one though.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_638275640.jpg)
Now imagine squeezing your ‘one-that-must-not-be-named’ wearing that.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_760797375.jpg)
3. For all those who masturbate with two hands.
Bhagwan sab dekh raha hai. Teri yeh harkat bhi.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_976659270.jpg)
4. If you can’t stop them, ‘crucify’ them.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_816240801.jpg)
5. Letting wrestlers drive home the message.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_206189618.jpg)
And make sure you leave your ‘willy’ alone.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_176175677.jpg)
6. Keeping it ‘strait’ and simple.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_914802100.jpg)
7. Better still, just cage the ‘demon’.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_453045053.jpg)
I know you’re wondering where you can buy this. Well, here’s the link .
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_887952634.jpg)
8. Promote more cartoons like these.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_620852954.jpg)
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_986076135.jpg)
9. Use dolphins to spread the noble message.
Meet Fappy the anti-masturbation dolphin.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_439889706.png)
If you missed it, read the conditions carefully.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_638903062.png)
And Fappy has an important message for you.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_239807294.jpg)
And Fappy never minces his words. Never.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_670911202.jpg)
I see no reason why we too can’t put our dolphins to equally good use. And he even has his own Facebook page.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_850345575.jpg)
10. Distribute funnels like these. Na rahega haath, na bajegi bansuri.
![](https://wp.scoopwhoop.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/567738296e510a6f3a75d299_889283962.jpg)