We found the most single person on Twitter. He goes by the handle, ‘Aasshiqq‘ and tweets about his heartbreak in the most hilarious way ever. His bio reads, “mere saare imtihaano ka jawab tu,” and that’s not even half of how dramatic he can be.
So this Singles Day, here are our favourite words of wisdom by Single Twitter’s flag-bearer.
itna air pollution hai ki aaj usne mujhe samajh ke kisi aur ko haan kardi.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) November 3, 2019
diwali ka time bhi ajeeb hota hai, patakha wo dikhti hai aur jalte hum hain.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) October 25, 2019
aaj usne traffic signal pe apni car rok kar mera haath maanga, fir dus ka note pakda kar chali gayi.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) October 20, 2019
karwa chauth to nahi par wo mera chautha zaroor karwa degi.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) October 17, 2019
lagta hai aaj shaam me wo kuch dosto ke saath mere ghar aaegi, suna unka joker dekhne ka plan hai.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) October 12, 2019
aaj usko yaad kar ke roya nahi hu, dry day haina.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) October 2, 2019
kehte hain is jahan me har kisi ke liye koi bana hai lekin uske liye kaafi log bane hain, chutiya.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 27, 2019
subah ki chai aur uska ‘hi’, sabko naseeb nahi hota.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 26, 2019
uska rasta dekhte dekhte khud raste par aa gaye.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 23, 2019
ghar pe full sound me gaane chal rahe hain magar main nahi naach pa raha, kyunki main sirf uski dhun par naachta hu.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 22, 2019
kabhi movie dekhne ka mann hota hai to aaj bhi do ticket book karta hu, ek uske liye ek uske dost ke liye.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 19, 2019
ishq me fanna hona tha, juice machine se nikla ganna ho gaya.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 13, 2019
kapde press karne ki dukaan khol li hai, suna hai usko ironman kaafi pasand hai.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 11, 2019
mera gum ab usse dekha nahi jaata, isliye aajkal meri taraf dekhti bhi nahi hai.
— Aasshiiqq (@Aasshiiqq) September 8, 2019
Ouch, that’s got to hurt.