Us Malayalis, we’ve taken a lot of stick over the years. Granted it’s all in good fun, with the aiyo’s and ‘idli-sambar’ nicknames. Along the way a few stereotypes have been unfairly pinned on us. While some are justified (filter coffee really is delicious), most of them are just downright dumb. So, here are a few you should try and avoid, next time you bump into a Malayali.
1. First of all, we’re not Madrasis. Heck, most Tamilians aren’t even Madrasis.
2. No, we’re not all fishermen. Stop asking us to tell a species of fish just by looking at it.
3. Our life’s mission isn’t to migrate to the “Gelf”. It’s to take over the world.
Tell me you haven’t seen at least one of us everywhere you’ve been.
4. Yes, we do like the occasional dab of coconut oil. But we don’t bathe in it.
Just enough to keep the hair smooth and shiny yo!
5. We don’t live on a permanent diet of idli, sambar and dosa.
6. And no, we don’t always eat it on a banana leaf either. The 21st Century did reach the shores of Kerala too, y’know?
7. Our women are not addicted to gold. And saris. Or gold on saris.
If there was so much gold lying around in Kerala, why would we leave?
8. Also, not all our women are nurses. A fair share, but not all.
So stop asking me to get you a discount every time you need a medical check up.
9. Not all of us have funny accents. Now, jest pazz uz thee koeffee.
10. Although it might seem that way, our natural flora does not consist solely of coconut trees.
11. We don’t all wear mundus all the time. Even though we probably should. Ah, the breeze.
12. Our films aren’t just a mind numbing sequence of crazy action scenes.
Unlike most of our Bollywood counterparts.
13. We’re not all alcoholics. But we won’t say no to a well blended Scotch.
14. Contrary to what you might think, most of us are dedicated non-vegetarians.
Even if it’s North Indian.
15. We’re lazy. Okay, I’ll give you that one, but would you feel like working if you lived in a place called “God’s Own Country”?
16. We don’t all look the same. Like a packet of Gems chocolates, we come in all shapes and colours.
17. All Malayali names aren’t a mini biography.
Believe it or not, we prefer short names too.
18. We don’t know every other Malayali in the immediate vicinity.
It’s not like we wear matching clothes and attend group meetings.