The wedding season is just round the corner and here we are, sitting on a couch, staring at the big pile of wedding invites, as we hog on some hot Hakka noodles. And then, some more. We, single and independent women who aren’t whole yet, according to society. And this is exactly why we find weddings frustrating. They reinforce the screwed up idea of being 25 (or above) and single as the worst crime we’re committing.
The struggle is real and sometimes, mere words aren’t enough to express the anguish, anger and frustration that we go through. So here is a poem that tries to express the thoughts of a single girl of a ‘marriageable age’ at an Indian wedding.
1. For your parents, all weddings are like a rehearsal for your wedding.
2. At some point you start questioning the idea of a ‘big fat Indian wedding’ and tell yourself this isn’t for you.
3. But you also start wondering what it would actually feel like to be a bride.
4. If you’re 20 something and unmarried, you’ll be attracting a lot of people. Not people your age, but aunties.
5. Nobody cares about how well you’re doing for yourself and what you want in life. All they want to know is who’s that boy with you in your photos.
6. Your parents aren’t just guests at a wedding. They’re students, and they’re completing an assignment called ‘your wedding.’
7. If someone paid you every time a relative said ‘you’re next,’ you’d be a millionaire. If only.
8. You thought you’d be checking out all the hotties, but your mom’s beating you at it.
9. Suddenly everyone recognises you for what (they think) you are: a baby-making machine.
10. Your parents start socialising at the speed of lightening, offline and online. OMG!
11. Other people’s weddings act as a wake up call for your parents.
12. And you finally tell yourself you’re not attending another shaadi ever… till you do, again.
And that, my friends, is how life’s pretty damn unfair.
Illustrations credit: Anish Kumar Daolagupu