Rape: (verb) to force (someone) to have sex with you by using violence or the threat of violence.
The above definition in Merriam-Webster should clear the basics. Collins , however, qualifies the above definition by adding ‘esp. women’ to it. But nowhere does it say that rape is an issue singularly pertaining to women.
Reddit user BrofessorNeeko
In a recent discussion on askreddit, a user addressed male rape victims and asked them what happened, if they told anyone and if they were taken seriously. It garnered a LOT of response. Some of the answers are heartbreaking, some infuriating and all very unbelievable. But the most disheartening thing is that almost none of the perpetrators were taken to task.
Reddit user Nomad8619
For the uninitiated, or whoever has never really though about it, let us put it straight – men are raped too. For those who are wondering how and why, it is as simple as this – if it is not consensual, it is rape and this does not include statutory rape.
Reddit user guyfromiowa
The problem lies in the fact that most of these men were not taken seriously. In most cases, these men were congratulated because ‘women wanted them so bad’. Because they were ‘studs’ and ‘dudes’. And they definitely ‘liked it’. Even then some went ahead and registered complaints but no action was taken.
It is not only the authorities but people close to these victims are at fault too. A user mentioned that ” None of my friends stopped her because some “bros don’t cock block bros” bullshit” while another said that “Everyone knew, and everyone thought it was hilarious.” It is just thought processes like these that are making the situation worse.
Reddit user joeywr12
Some of these men were violated at home and by people they were really close to, like family members, babysitters, teachers and even friends. Some were violated by their girlfriends and some by their bosses.
Reddit user Throwawayellesstar
A whole lot of them were drugged because the perpetrating women could not have matched their physical strength otherwise. And some were even victims of physical and emotional abuse.
Reddit user mrmrchoice
Some of these men still haven’t said it to anyone because they think that acknowledging that they were raped by a woman would make them less manly. And almost everyone had a very rough time coping with their rape.
Quite a lot of these men sought help from therapists, some were nursed back to normalcy by their loving girlfriends and wives, while some are still struggling.
Reddit user RadioSporkPancake
But going through the responses it was heartbreaking to see that a lot of them are either in denial or are still not sure if they should call it rape.
It is also a cause of concern because if they are unsure then the number of male rape victims in hand are grossly misleading. And until one gets the approximate number, it will not be seen as an issue deemed worthy of discussion.
Reddit user prostateExamination
The point is that male rape is not a myth. It is nothing to be brushed away. It is as real and serious as women getting raped. Men might not have to carry the physical damage as women do but the psychological damage is as real.
Reddit user electricdog
The point here is to reveal how serious the problem is. The stigma attached to a rape victim – male or female – needs to be done away with. And like women, more men need to recognise this issue and speak up and register complaints against the perpetrators.
Reddit user snowlovesnow
Moreover, it is not about which side is the greater sufferer, it is mostly about what ‘rape’ itself is. And it should not be hard to see that the only way both men and women can address and fight the issue of rape is by mutual understanding.
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