If I were Sia, my Cheap Thrills would be about going to a bar on a Friday night with lots of dollar bills and no baby on the side. Sometimes, all you need is a drink and no one else around. But then, that ain’t happening anytime soon because I live in India and here, going alone to a bar is either ‘sad’, ‘lame’ or just ‘not happening’!
While drinking is an obvious form of social interaction, a way to let loose and have a good time and even, unwind and relax, why is drinking considered fine if only done with other people around?
Why do I need to drink only with friends, family, colleagues or partner? Why can’t I just go to a bar after a long day at work, buy a drink, sit down and enjoy it without getting untoward looks and stares?
Why is going to a bar alone considered such a sad thing?
Sometimes, you need a break from people.
In our fast lives and even faster social media lives, it’s rare to get a moment just to yourself. When we’re not working, we’re busy meeting up with friends and family or spending time with our respective partners. And when doing none of the above, we’re tweeting and putting up stories on Instagram and Snapchat. Hell, even Facebook now lets you put up a story.
There’s so much to do and so little time. As a result, the only one we have no time for is our own self.
So, if someone wants to take that time for one’s own self, what is the problem in that? Some people use this spare time to pursue a hobby and some attend a Yoga class. There are those who like to sit with a mug of hot chocolate and a great book and there are those who find peace and fulfillment in cooking. And all of that is fine.
Yet, when someone chooses to go to a bar and have a drink with absolutely no one, that’s somehow a big problem with the rest of the people present around.
Try as you may, you can’t be done with a single pint without inviting a dozen minimum stares!
Not everyone has someone or the other, always for company.
Sometimes, you’ve just had a breakup and want to drown your sorrows in a dirty martini, or ten. Or, maybe you stay alone and have hopped to the neighborhood watering hole for a nightcap. Maybe you’re traveling to a different city for work. Or, maybe you just don’t feel like meeting anyone that evening.
It’s okay to want to be by yourself some time. It’s okay to want to think over something over a glass of wine. It’s perfectly fine if you’re not seeking company.
Different strokes for different folks, right?
Then why can’t others present focus on their respective partners and drinks instead? Is someone sitting alone at a bar putting on a show that’s far more exciting?
Going alone to a bar takes guts and oodles of confidence.
It’s not for those who can’t step out of their homes without a friend in toe. Not for those who walk into parties pretending to be on the phone. And certainly not for those who always want to appear as ‘exciting’ and ‘happening’ by hanging out with a bunch of people.
The next time you find someone alone at a bar, don’t show them your pity. Instead, remember how you can never, ever do that!
Also, not every person sitting alone at a bar is a raging alcoholic.
“Bechara! Must be so addicted to drinking. No wonder he’s got no friends with him!“
What if that ‘he’ just wants to be left the fuck alone?
A bar is just like a park, only with cocktails!
When it’s okay for someone to go for a run, all by themselves, with music plugged in their ears, why can’t one do that at a bar? Not run, though, but you know, just sit, have a drink, listen to the music and enjoy the flush of happy-high hormones?
It’s time we stopped judging those who’re at a bar without any company.
Because sometimes, all you need is your own self. And a whiskey on the rocks, on the side!