A few days ago, in a press conference, Prime Minister Manmohan Singh showed full confidence in Rahul Gandhi as a strong contender to be our next P.M. Now jokes apart, let’s think of all the possible actions he will take if he actually becomes our P.M.

Here’s a wrap on everything Rahul Gandhi will achieve in his tenure.

1. Pass the Sonia Gandhi National Confidence Law (SGNCL) to remove poverty in the country because it’s just a state of mind.

2. Keep ‘Mum’ at all press conferences.

3. Start a new news channel that is unbiased, fair & only reports hard facts. Call it Gandhi TV.

4. Make Robert Vadra the Minister for Urban Development & “Land Acquisition.”

5. Appoint Manmohan Singh as the spokesperson of the Congress.

6. Make a Congress theme song & call it ‘Gandhi Baat.’

7. Send the first Dalit astronaut to outer space. Escape velocity & all that.

8. Start a new clothing range called ‘Politics by Rahul’ so that politics can actually be in our shirts & pants.

9. Make a “No Nonsense” crack team that will go & tear up anything he finds annoying.

10. Make pasta the national dish & give a 150% subsidy to Italian Restaurants.

11. Promote bee farming in a big way & call it the “Yellow Revolution.” Because India is like a beehive.

12. Make it mandatory for Sonia Gandhi to be addressed as ‘The Great Holy Honorable Chief Queen Mother Of India.’

13. Put Indira Gandhi’s face on a new denomination of 1 lac rupees.

14. Appoint Arvind Kejriwal as his personal tutor for private coaching.

15. Ban this article.