I am not a believer of astrology, unless the predictions are in my favour.

If it says I will get a promotion, find a partner, travel: I want to believe that kinda thing.

But my faith has been shattered now. 2020 was supposed to be my year; that's what the astrologers said. From what angle is it my year, though? Please tell me?

Here's a part of prediction for my sunsign Gemini, for 2020:

You see the timing of this?

March 23! Two days later the country went into a lockdown and my stress levels peaked like anything.

But what does this say? Peace of mind and satisfaction. I mean, buddy, itna jhooth?

Moving on, another website said this about my future.

This is a bit realistic in that my patience is being tested every waking moment of the day, but travel? Huh?

Rahu into Taurus will create circumstances for you to travel abroad - Well, Rahu clearly did not try enough because I can't go to my bagal waala park, let alone another country.

And that too for a good amount of time, so ye kahan se aaya?

Anyway, something about the money stuff. Let's see what the astrologers thought was in store for me.

Where do I even begin with the kind of vibes I have been getting from my financial conditions in this first half!

Pay cut had to happen and it was coupled with the 'stocking time' so I have really no savings right now. And f*ck you for giving me hope.

Numerology also had to say some things about how my year was going to be. To quote a website:

When you have seven as your personal year number for 2020, it is time to relax and take some time for yourself. Number seven is a number for reflection and self-growth. It’s time for some you time. Take advantage of this year and all of the things that come with it.

You'd best believe I am getting time to myself but 'relaxation' toh ek mazaak hai at this point.

We are stuck in such a loop of kaam-bartan-kaam-bartan-kaam, that 'taking a break' has become a joke. So dekh lo aap.

Not one. NOT. EVEN. ONE astrologer predicted this.

Or hinted that a world-halting event will change everything as we know it.

They were all like pyaar milega paisa milega, but look at me now, sitting in the shirt I have been wearing for a week and eating Wai-Wai for lunch.

Sab fraud hai.