People talk a lot about the friends we make on the way, the relationships we forge for life. But no one talks about the friendships we end up losing too. When we fail at friendships, we end up blaming ourselves, for not being able to maintain a good, meaningful connection.
There are plenty of reasons why friendships fall apart – we fall out of touch, differences and fights happen, some friends need to be cut out of our lives, or sometimes friends just simply drift apart.
There are some friendships that simply cannot be salvaged. No matter how hard you try, some friends are never the same.
Some of us are quick to play the blame game. “It is all his fault”. “She never understood me.” “He stopped making the effort.” But the truth is, no one is to blame.
Losing friends doesn’t make you a bad friend. Because every friendship has served its own purpose in your life. These friends are only meant to be in your life for a brief period, after which you go your own way.
This doesn’t mean there was some fault in you as a friend or an individual- it is simply a part of life. It is growth. It is totally normal to outgrow some friendships. And totally fine to see how toxic some friendships were in hindsight. Not all friendships were meant to last a lifetime, and there is maturity in accepting that some friends are not in your life anymore.
At the time, they were exactly what you needed. But now, you are wiser.
Some friends come into your life only for a brief amount of time. Each of these friends have served a purpose in your life, just like you did in theirs. You gain and learn from each other as much as you can. But sooner or later, priorities might shift, and with more experience in life you realise what you want from friends – and these friends don’t offer it. Respect the years of friendship you had with them before the years of hate you bred for each other.
Some friends come with a set shelf life, and there is no bad blood when these friendships fall apart. Friendships will take their natural course, and whether they last or not, is something only time can tell.
The important part of losing friends is acceptance. To know it is only normal to lose friendships like this. You don’t need to stay friends with everyone you ever met to prove a point. You learn your lessons, maybe help each other become different people and move on in life with nothing but good wishes for each other. Totally fine if you hate them also.
