You'd be lying if you say you have never imagined yourself going to your ex's wedding. *** channa mereya intensifies *** Among the many thoughts that pop into our heads after a breakup, this one remains persistent. Though it's completely a personal choice, one should only go if they have moved on.
A guy on Reddit asked if he should attend his ex-girlfriend's wedding, who cheated on him, and men delivered some valuable advice. Read on.
1. "I hadn't talked to my ex for a whole year and one day out of the blue she called and invited me to her wedding. I didn't go as I had an entrance exam for MBA the very next morning. But I was unable to sleep the whole night and I had a feeling that I would screw up in the exam. But the next morning I convinced myself that this chapter is closed for good. I took out the SIM card so that she could never contact me again. I had never felt that relieved about that relationship. I went and took the exam and surprisingly did well."
2. "I think you should go. In my case I was in a similar situation, just the thought of her being with someone else would kill me. Her getting married was unimaginable. At the time I could not imagine getting together with anyone else. Eventually, her wedding day was announced. And I was invited. I was a wreck, did not want to go but could not help myself. Had some gin for courage. But surprisingly it wasn't that bad. In fact, the whole thing gave me closure and helped me move on."
3. "Please go. But first, update your tinder profile asking for someone to join you as a date for your ex’s wedding. Mention the free Mughlai food and the possibility of drama. Mention that your date might get a chance to make the bride jealous and ruin her day. Don’t forget to mention the food. You might enjoy the date. You might get your sweet revenge."
4. "I went to one of my Ex's weddings, simply because we were best friends before we started dating and remained good friends after we broke up. Believe me, it is always kinda hard. Even if you honestly think it won't matter much, it does. It doesn't hurt, per se. But it feels like a part of your past now belongs to someone else. It's weird."
5. "My rule is zero-contact with an ex. Maybe others can stay friends after a breakup but in my experience 99% of the time it's one person moving on and the other feeling like shit. So there's no fucking way I'm attending any weddings of any of my exes whatsoever. That part of my life is done and I have no intention of revisiting the past. I would strongly advise you to do the same."
6. "As somebody already stated, "once a cheater, always a cheater". You are just going to bring more pain to yourself, and also witness the beginning of the destruction of the Man who is going to be her husband. Always stay miles away from such type of negativity, if you love yourself."
7. "Your break up was not cordial. She cheated. And you still need advice on whether you should attend her wedding? If you have even a single molecule of self-respect in you then you will not attend the wedding. Move on man. You may or may not get a new girlfriend and/or relationship. But as far as this girl is concerned, the chapter is closed. Be strong my king!"
8. "In this inflation I wouldn't pass up a free meal and make her uncomfortable by being at the wedding. It's a win-win situation."
9. "Only go if you can pull off Channa Mereya - otherwise, move on with your life and don't ruin her big day."
10. "My ex is getting married this month. She told me about it but never asked me to be a part of it. The fact that she didn't invite me gave me closure in a weird way. I guess if you don't go, you might have that lingering feeling that you should have. I'd say go to the wedding, congratulate the couple, and leave. Might give you closure."
11. "I went to one of my ex-best friend’s engagements who bullied me into depression and I ended up changing schools because of her. Her grandfather invited me because he and my mom used to teach at the same government school. I went there alone, my mom was skeptical about it. I felt amazing that day. Not only was it a day of me smiling in her face but I didn’t feel the need to have a reason to feel happy. I met her parents. It was awkward for them but I kept it minimal. I was glammed up. I picked my best outfit. And trust me, from that day, it’s been a journey uphill. Once you’re able to smile and look into their eyes without that feeling in the pit of your stomach, that’s the first day of the rest of your liberated life. You need that closure. Believe me. You will thank yourself later."
12. "Just stay stoic my friend. You can do much better than her. Don't get drunk at her wedding. And remember, once a cheater is always a cheater."
13. "Go only if there is Shahi paneer and Gulab jamun on the menu. Else it's not worth the hassle. Just move on."
14. "If you haven't moved on then you should go and if you are already moved on then you shouldn't go."
15. "Why do you want to see this or be a part of it? Seriously. You will never be able to get the image of the woman you loved (i assume) marrying someone else. Cut your ties. Move forward. Heal and win in life. You D.O.N.T. owe her shit. Esp going to her wedding."
16. "Sorry! But It's time for some tough love buddy. Step 1: Google what is self-respect. Step 2: Practice developing self-respect. Your self-love and respect will grow together. Once you have it you will have your answer. Till then you won’t understand why you shouldn't go to her wedding."
17. "Even if you are at peace with your previous relationship with her, I would suggest you skip it. It will be just a waste of your time and an unnecessary hassle. Besides, if there are other guests there who know about your relationship with her, it might get a tad bit weird."
18. "So I went to my ex’s wedding just to fulfil her one last wish (it was a mutual breakup and she wanted me to be there, I even gave a yes for the groom 🤦🏽♂️), but I got two of my friends tagged along who didn't know each other well, and after the wedding, we three are now the best travel group I ever had. I’ve done multiple treks, camping, and trips with these two guys, and all thanks to the ex’s wedding. So it turned out pretty good for me."
19. "My advice: don’t go but if you have to then go and see the mother and hand over whatever gift you are buying and then scoot out of there. Your obligation is done."
20. "Totally depends on you. It will be the happiest choice for some to go and will be saddest for some, weighing the different factors of emotions, toleration, where are you in the move-on phase, etc. If I were you and had I moved on, I would use every other opportunity to freeload, and the audience-esqe enjoy her nonsense as she did to me in the past."