When you are in a new relationship, it is often difficult to spot toxic things or behaviour, considering you just met this person. But here’s a thing if you look back on your past breakups and introspect -you’ll notice how many red flags you overlooked in the beginning!
All we have done is spotted some red flags that are a clear signal of why you should walk away, so read on.
1. “Always make sure this new person is willing to respect your boundaries. If you say “I’m really not comfortable talking about that” and they keep on asking, that’s not a person who considers your needs. This is the ultimate test for a narcissist – they never respect boundaries and only truly care for getting what they want.”
2. “Love-bombing. I read about it a while ago. If they do something wrong and try to cover it up with a ton of affection, that’s not good. Don’t let their “love” for you overshadow the bad things they say or do to you.”
3. “If you are doing all of the chasing/initiating/getting in contact first. Yes, at the beginning of a relationship maybe one person does more, but it should quickly equalize if you are both into it.”
4. “Lying (especially about major things), flakiness, not being emotionally available/stable, outright disrespectful behavior, and making you question your worth. If your friends are concerned about genuine things, listen to them, they’re just trying to look out for you. I made the mistake of ignoring all red flags and my friend’s advice and landed in a world of hurt.”
5. “Do not be with someone who tells you who you can and can’t spend time with. My ex was constantly shit-talking my friends and trying to make me feel guilty for spending time with them instead of her. It’s sad to say that I still haven’t rekindled a relationship with some of my best friends during that time.”
6. “One is how they talk about the people closest to them. If they are talking bad about their mom or best friend etc. All the time they may be the issue. They may have a lot of negativity in their life that they created on their own, you don’t need that!”
7. “Emotional abuse usually starts with guilt-tripping. Getting upset unreasonably, claiming to be more sensitive than normal but lack empathy, blaming you for things you can’t control, or bringing up past mistakes to get their way are some major red flags to look out for.”
8. “If a guy tells you his ex is crazy. Talking like jealous and insecure. My first instinct is to wonder what he did to make her feel that way. I’m not saying it’s always like that. Some girls are just crazy. But I know from first-hand experience how a guy will treat you like shit, cheat and lie then label you crazy for reacting.”
9. “Making you feel bad for having a life outside of them. Especially in a new relationship, don’t alienate your friends or family, or ditch your hobbies because someone is trying to guilt-trip you into dedicating all your time to them. It’s manipulative and not ok. Someone who cares about you will support you in what you want to do and the people you care about.”
10. “Too controlling. When the person keeps texting you “wyd” at all times when you’re not with them. When the person is jealous of your relationship with friends, family, etc. When they become angry/aggressive for no reason. You can easily see this once the person gets drunk.”
11. “Moving too fast. People who profess love, and say you’re their life partner, and why don’t they move in — within the first few weeks or even months — are moving fast for a reason.”
12. “People that have cheated before and do not own the mistake. Blames the relationship or the ex. You’re next.”