In my family and in most other Indian families, there's an age by which women should get married if they really want to. This age is important because it defines your entire existence.
Although the age factor varies across regions, classes and communities, one thing is common - the biological clock is ticking.
Those born in 1990-1998 please can you briefly tell us why you not married yet.— Suraksha 🇵🇰 (@weirdladyyy) August 28, 2021
Serious answers only
All through these years, I wondered who would have come up with the idea of setting a deadline for women to get married before they turned 30. And when I didn't find any logic in what society had to say, I decided that I won't let the number affect me.
It didn't. I married my boyfriend after 30 and as opposed to the popular belief, it turned out to be one of the best decisions of my life.
I waited to get into marriage because we did not want to rush into it.
I waited because I started my career in late-20s and wanted to be sure about my finances.
I waited because I took the time to figure out what I really wanted in life.
I see people who still look at unmarried women after age 30 as pity.— Maaya🥀 (@aaromalearvindh) August 18, 2021
So sad they never realize that she won herself!
I was always told '30 ke baad kaun shaadi karega', 'Phir bache kab karoge', 'Adjust karne mein bahot problem hogi'.
It's not that I didn't know all these talks were baseless societal standards but now when I am married, I have realised my decision was right. I am more mature to handle things be it family adjustments or arguments with my partner.
It wouldn't have been the same if I had gotten married a few years earlier.
My now-husband and I met in our mid-20s. We became friends, dated and gave each other all the time and support to gain a sense of financial security and emotional maturity. We needed those years to fix our careers and I'm grateful we didn't succumb to the societal pressure.
We decided to get married in our late 20s. Why? We were completely ourselves, secure in our own skin, established in our careers, and with a clear view of what is most important to us.
Today, I know why I married him in the first place. I know we have each other's backs no matter what the situation is. I know we are independent enough to take our decisions.
We don't see marriage as an achievement rather it's a promise we made to spend the rest of our lives together.
When I look back I do not have any regrets. Things are so much better.
I spent my 20s learning a lot of things and developed a better sense of self. I am a stronger individual with more confidence.
The bhuas, chachis and mausis who thought I won't find a 'suitable' boy were the happiest at my wedding.
The parlour vali didis who thought face par wrinkles dikhenge were shocked because I looked my best.
The sex is great. The romance is not dead.
Now, you might be reading this and say that you or someone you know got married in their 20s and are leading their lives happily. That might absolutely be the case. My point here is that it varies from person to person and getting married in your 30s shouldn't feel awkward or out of place at all.