There is an unsaid rule in India, that the best age to get a girl married is in her early 20s. And if you’re a single woman, over the age of 25, then the pressure to get married increases so much with each passing year, that being single in your 30s deserves an award! 

But these women decided to wait till they were ready and marry only when they wanted to, even if it meant crossing the ‘big 3-0’, and not when society wanted them to: 

1. “I wanted to get married to someone who accepted me as I am. Someone, who appreciated my ambitions and stood by me while I shattered the glass ceiling! And it could only happen when I myself knew the bounds, knew the glass ceiling that I had to break, knew what I wanted to achieve in life. That self-awareness happened at 30, so it made sense to get married post that!”

– Aakanksha

2. “Personally, I wanted to do justice to my professional aspirations. I wanted to wait and get married to a man who treats me like an equal. I didn’t want to stereotype my marriage and succumb to societal pressure, but rather, wait when I was emotionally ready. I didn’t believe that I can’t make babies after 30. All it needs is to be physically fit irrespective of your 20s or 30s. There are many goals women have, or at least, I had, that I wanted to achieve except for marriage. And marriage wasn’t my only big day or event. I associated my promotions, travels, even those solo trips as big days and events of my life. Most importantly, I believed in love and waited for my time, just didn’t want to do it the arranged way.”

– Vasundhara Surajgaria


3. “I met my husband at 33, got married at 36. I just turned 38 last week. I had been single most of my life, he had a couple of long-term relationships before me. I had been off/on the dating sites for a long time. A couple of horror stories, a couple of great dates/short-term relationships/friendships, but nothing that ever worked out long-term. I think one of the “pros” of meeting older was that we both knew what we wanted, and were both very comfortable in our senses of “self”, if that makes sense. I do wish that I met him earlier in life – but I couldn’t be happier than I am right now with him.

4. “We met when I was 28 and married when I was 35. I’m 41 now and everything’s great. If we’d met when I was younger, say in my early 20s I think we might not have lasted. I was a little too dramatic, entitled, selfish, etc. I wasn’t all bad, I was just in turbo mode.”

5.I re-met my now-husband (we lost touch after elementary school) 3 years ago when we were 31. We got married just a couple of months ago. I can honestly say I knew by the third time I saw him I was going to marry him & spend my life with him. Sure, we lament about the time we lost in our twenties, but we both agree that all the situations and relationships and things we faced then made us the compatible super-duo we are now. I absolutely believe that we found each other at the right time. On a personal note, I 100% was not ready for the commitments & responsibilities of married domestic life before my now-husband. I’m pleased with how everything has worked out.”

6.I was 36 and he was 31 when we married. We got pregnant naturally 18 months later after only 6 months of trying, and I’m now 38 and 6 months pregnant. So screw any worries about being too old to date, marry or have a family after 30. I wouldn’t have done it any other way, I’m so much more calm and able to handle stuff now.”

– Reddit User


7. “Met at 29, married at 31, now am 35. It was a combination of good timing, knowing what we each wanted in a partner, being a bit older, being financially established that made our dating so quick. I do think that the older you meet, the less time it takes to know if it’ll work long-term or forever, or not.”

8. “I met my husband when I was 33 and I had been single for like 8 years (some flings and whatnot but nothing serious within that time). We got married and have a 3 year old and another due in December and I’m happy to have a family but also happy to have had plenty of quiet, “selfish” me time.”

9. “30 is still plenty of time in my book. I didn’t find the right guy until age 37. I wish I would have met him earlier than that, but neither of us was mentally quite ready to conduct a healthy relationship until our mid-30s. Not just that but we both kept being drawn to people who turned out to be wrong for us, maybe subconsciously we didn’t think we deserved better, or knew ourselves well enough to recognize what was a good fit? I took a few years to know myself via living alone, understanding my preferences, treating myself well (dating myself too), and honoring my boundaries. I worked on my passion/hobbies/personal goals enough to know it wasn’t something I would drop for a SO. After one particularly awful relationship, I nearly gave up finding anyone altogether and made a decision to pursue my goals solo rather than waiting for Prince Charming to start. Not long after that, I found my Mr. Right.”

10. “I was single at 30 and it was great. I was able to achieve things on my own and have my own experiences as me, not as half of a couple. I got married in my 30’s, as did most of my friends, and we’re happier than the people who settled down in their 20’s. Those people seem to have a lot of regrets.”

11. “At one point I started worrying if I was being ‘too picky’ but resolved that I’d rather be single than in a miserable relationship with someone I wasn’t interested in. Wanting to be attracted to your partner is not ‘too picky’. I finally found the right guy for me when I was 31. We’ve been together for 5 years so far. If you ask me, definitely worth the wait.”

– Anonymous

12.Met my husband at 35. Happily married for almost 13 years now. And I see stories like this all the time in my circle. It may become harder with age to randomly find someone who is single and dateable enough to consider. But also, your outlook sharpens to pick out those who are really worth it. My final advice: Don’t make dating your priority, make meeting interesting people, regardless of gender, your priority. Work on yourself. Learn to like yourself. It sounds banal, but healthy self-esteem is the biggest aphrodisiac there is.”

13. “I met my now-husband when I was 37 and we married when I was 39. I had been single for a while before we met but was nursing a bad breakup/abuse PTSD. I was very, very single with zero desire to get involved with anybody so it was a shock when he came into my orbit. He was also planning to move to a different city and do a different life so we pretty much screwed up each other’s plans big time. The trick, I guess if you want to say it that way, is being contentedly single and getting it in your head that you might stay that way forever. Sounds bleak but that’s the only way to take the pressure and expectation out of meeting someone and thinking “is this person the one?” every time you have a good date.”

14. “Was 35 when an old friend struck up a conversation out of nowhere and asked me out. I remained skeptical and detached for like two months until I realised this was the greatest relationship I’d ever been in and I didn’t want it to end. Most people have twists and turns in their relationship journeys, and 30 is far from the end of days cut-off it’s treated as. I’m now starting to see people around me divorce and remarry, ending up much happier with people better suited to their older selves than they would have been growing older with previous partners. Work on yourself and date when you feel like it but keep it low stakes. Your relationship status is not a reflection of you or an indication of your future.”

15. “When I was 34, I decided to stop dating losers and live for myself. I tried new adventures, traveled, met new friends, and did things for myself. How amazing! That summer I met a nice guy. He wasn’t the typical guy I was used to dating. I almost let him go but he was patient and kind. We fell in love and got engaged 10 months later. Married 6 months after that. I wish I hadn’t spent my 20s being miserable and alone. I wish I had loved myself without needing a man to define my self-worth. I believe it was a lot of time wasted. I think looking back, I didn’t need a man to make my life happy, I needed a happy life to attract a great man to share it with.”

16. “I don’t think I was looking to “get married”. I was just going through life, finding new career opportunities, breaking up with boyfriends, and finding new ones through my 20s. I kept changing cities for studies or work and dated locally. And I just stumbled on (maybe fate!) my now-husband when I was in my late 20s. I wasn’t looking for a serious relationship before I met him but then we just became really good friends while dating. I had a list of things I’d prefer in a guy who I’d marry and he happened to tick each of them. One thing led to another, he asked me to marry him, I said yes, and we just did it near my 30th birthday. Basically, I did not “wait” to get married, but chose instead to surf through life. And on the way, found the perfect guy and got married. Now I don’t have to lie to my family when I am traveling with him or we are living together because of “taboos before marriage” with Indian parents.”

– Nikita

The Mary Sue

The basic fact is, the right age to get married is the age at which you feel ready. It can be in your 20s, 30s, or even later, as long as it’s something you actually, truly want.