Among the many things that patriarchy likes to weigh women down with, the guilt of being an inefficient mother is probably the most popular weapon of choice. 

Being a parent is hard, and as children or non-parents we often put our parents on a pedestal. And the truth is, they’re just as flawed as we are, and most probably, they’re trying to do their best with life, with us. 

Which is why we’ve curated a list of the most realistic representations of Indian moms that Bollywood has given us. Here, read on to know more. 

1. Neelam Mehra – Dil Dhadakne Do

Okay yes, Neelam Mehra was pretty toxic, especially as a mother. But, at the end of the day let’s not forget how she herself was suffering silently in a close-to-hollow marriage. 

Mrs. Mehra could be any of our mothers; a woman who was a product of patriarchy, so she grew up believing in the falseness of gender roles. And unfortunately ended up teaching her daughter the same. Not entirely her fault, TBH.

2. Priyamvada Kaushik – Badhaai Ho

Ageism (plus sexism) has taught us that women have to get married by a certain age, have children by a certain age and become grandparents by a certain age. 

But Badhaai Ho’s Priyamvada Kaushik helped us realize that sometimes, life just happens! And that our mothers are individuals who have their own lives and feelings and they can also be at the receiving end of life’s surprises. They don’t know everything, and that’s okay. 

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3. Shashi Godbole – English Vinglish

We think our parents judge us, but sometimes we’re the ones doing all the judging. Shashi was underestimated by her kids because she hadn’t quite mastered the English language. And the truth was that her language skills had nothing to do with the amazing person she was. 

She was a great mother, while still working on herself, what’s really wrong with that? Why do we expect our mothers to be perfect?

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4. Sulochana – Tumhari Sulu

Sulochana wanted a career and a family. But many times women are discouraged from wanting it all. And to make matters worse, we’re expected to think about everyone else’s convenience while chasing our dreams. 

Sulochana showed us that you can have goals and want a family, and not be immediately good at balancing the two! That as a wife and mother, women can lean on their family for support while they pursue their dreams. 

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5. Parminder Prakash – Hum Tum 

Parminder Prakash was one of the most supportive single moms we got see in Bollywood films. She was there for her daughter in all her life’s phases. 

But she was also excellent at knowing when to give her space and let her process life independently. 

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6. Ruksana Mohammad – Jalsa 

Ruksana Mohammad was a hard working mother, who we clearly saw having a justifiable breakdown upon finding out who was really behind her daughter’s demise. 

Mothers have the right to feel rage and every seemingly unpleasant emotion possible, they’re not idols of love and selflessness. They’re human beings who can also feel hatred and anger towards people.

7. Savitri – Jaane Tu… Ya Jaane Na

Again, one of the most supportive mothers Bollywood has given us. Savitri had her own fears, and had an incredibly interesting personality. 

She is a reminder that our moms also have their own inner worlds that are insanely rich and worth knowing about. 

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Here’s to all these superb moms that Bollywood gave us. Because, at the end of the day, parents are human beings, they’re not perfect and often times they grow with us and unlearn many things along the way, just like we do.