Tablets have been around for a while. But it seems that some people just don’t want to accept their existence. Or understand people who own them. That’s why people who are naïve enough to brandish their tablets in public get bombarded with the following questions.

1. “Does your tablet have a touch screen?”

You: No. I am Professor Xavier. I control it with my mind.

2. “Does your tablet have Angry Birds?”

You: Why are you so hung up on Angry Birds?

3. “Must have been really expensive, no?”

You: Yes. I parted with a kidney to buy this.

4. “Can you attach a mouse to your tablet?”

You: Sure I can. Please catch one and gift it to me.

5. “Why didn’t you buy a fablet?”

You: Because I didn’t want people to think that I just got slapped on the face.

6. “Why are you using such a big phone?”

You: *Face-palm*

7. “The camera must be very nice na? With such a big screen and all that?”

You: You must be a toddler na? With such a small brain and all that?

8. “Can you watch TV on this?”

You: No. But I can stream movies on it. Does that count?

9. “You can use it as a mirror too, right?”

You: Do you use a spoon as a knife?

10. “Did you get a smart pen with this so you can make paintings and stuff on it?”

You: No. But I have half a mind to draw something on your face.