Finding a caring and loving partner is a blessing. It’s all hunky-dory to be able to have fun and share precious moments with them. Isn’t it? When things turn serious, your relationship takes a step forward. You get to know your partner even more, be it through their reactions to certain situations, their bond with family members, or their understanding of managing finances. You dig deep into financial part of your relationship as you grow together. Of course, it starts with what your dates are like, whether you split bills with your partner or one of you always ends up paying the bill.
Having a transparent discussion about money early in a relationship can help prevent misunderstandings and potential conflicts down the road.
My partner and I prioritize sharing financial responsibilities and not falling into traditional gender roles when it comes to paying for dates. On personal level, I have always tried to maintain a healthy balance of ‘who pays on the date’. It’s never like ‘he is the guy, he must always pay’. At times, I end up treating him good meals, no matter what the bill amount is. Be it a chai date of ₹20- ₹40 or fine-dining meal of ₹500-₹1000. Of course, splitting bills is an option but we let one person pay the full amount on one date and the other one does it next time. It works for us.
We are getting married soon and as we step into this new chapter, we’ve decided to share certain wedding expenses, such as booking our photography team collaboratively through the 50-50 splitting method (dividing the total expense and paying half of it). For example: If the photography charges are ₹1 lakh, then simply pay ₹50,000 from your end. When it comes to travel or purchasing travel tickets, we ensure that we pay for ourselves.
We engage in thorough discussions to make financial choices that accommodate both of our circumstances, taking into account factors like our respective incomes, financial obligations, and other pertinent considerations. Looking ahead, the idea of crafting a joint budget to allocate funds for our various expenditures appears to be a logical step. Also, establishing an emergency fund to not only enhance our financial well-being but also foster its growth seems to be a reasonable approach.
Here are 5 takeaways from discussing money with my partner:
1. Don’t let money hamper your dates
Always opt for sharing financial responsibilities with your partner, irrespective of whether you are a man or a woman. Pay dates bills whenever you can. For some couples, splitting the bills work but let the chivalry do its job. It’s romantic.
2. Split for big expenses
Splitting money for travel tickets or wedding expenses is a great way to manage your finances. Pay for your half, and let your partner pay for the other half.
3. Be open about your financial status
When things are going serious in your relationship, naturally, you will have the phase where you can openly talk about money with your partner. Talk about your debts, liabilities, if any, so that there is a clear communication about finances. This will help in avoiding arguments in the future.
4. Talk about opening a joint account
Maintaining individual bank accounts offers a great opportunity to nurture personal independence. However, you can also consider a joint account shared with your partner. A balanced approach might involve allocating a minimum of 20% from each person’s income into this joint account. This collective fund could be earmarked for managing essential household expenditures such as rent, bills, and groceries.
5. Opt for an emergency fund
While a couple can manage their finances in different ways, it is always beneficial to have a dedicated fund in case of an emergency. Try putting at least 10% of both incomes into this fund. Having this financial safety net can help alleviate stress and unavoidable circumstances.
A couple that manages their finances together grows together. Have you discussed money with your partner yet?
