The first is always special, but the first is also not the way you imagined it to be. It’s uncomfortable and not as wild as you want it to be. So, yeah, losing your virginity is the most exciting and nerve-wracking experience overall.
Like always, Reddit got our backs to tell us the worst places to lose virginity, and you should be taking notes.
1. “Public hot tubs. Risk of germs, not to mention there could be tampons, rubbers, panty liners, band-aids, fake nails, toenails, mice, etc.”
2.”Waterslide. Whatever you think you can pull off during the ride, you’ll be at the bottom long before you can finish up. Don’t even try, unless you’re ready to face that consequence. And no, I’m not kidding. I’ve seen people try that. Not only is it highly impractical and an easy way to hurt yourself, but there’s also just not enough time.”
3. “Worst place by location is prison. Worst place by location on one’s own body, asshole. Combine those for a really bad time.”
4. “I lost mine on the bus. Not in the traditional way. Was keeping it in a shopping tote and just forgot to take it when I got off. Again, not in the traditional way.”
5. “At the house of someone you just met. Who won’t be careful/considerate of you and would want to just fuck for pleasure and not enjoy the intimacy that comes with the experience.”
6. “When I lost mine, my girlfriend at the time moved her desk to block her door so her dad wouldn’t barge in as he was keen on doing, usually barking demands about this or that, and she put on Incubus Succubus on the stereo to cover any noises. It’s funny what you remember.”
7.” At a party, I did the first time to a girl (already did mine before) I was completely drunk, I woke up from passing out an hour ago. She took me to the bedroom and I had difficulties getting it hard and she was really tight. I abandoned it at some point, it was the most miserable experience of my life and for her too.”
8.”I lost mine in an abandoned building filled with asbestos, used needles, suspiciously placed spoons, broken glass, and rust. it lasted about 3 seconds and was very painful and unsatisfying. 0/10 wouldn’t recommend.”
9. “A tent, I lost mine in a tent, with an old filament bulb, a large head camping torch casting my 2 pumps and a squirt in front of loads of people.”
10.” On a couch, in a living room, right before the parents of the kid you’re babysitting show up (The kid is sleeping upstairs btw).”
11.” In a forest where the poison oak and poison ivy are everywhere. I still feel bad. She said her butt itched and that meant doggie style….. I’ve never scratched my balls more in my life.”
12.”Picture this. You’re horny high school teens. You go to your friend’s studio apartment he shares with his parents (they’re not home). It’s you, your partner, your friend who lives there, & like 2 others. You both go into the bathroom & lose it on the toilet but oh no! You (a girl) start to bleed since it’s your first time!”
13.”The beach. There’s sand that is coarse, rough, and irritating. And it gets everywhere!”
14.”Movie theater hear me out “How did you lose your virginity” “Movie theater” “Ooooo spicy, liking the whole pubic thing?” “No, we were watching minions.”
15.” In the car. It’s hot, cramped, and you’ll hit your knees on all sorts of shit.”
16.” In any kind of water. Swimming, splashing around in a pool, Jacuzzi, anything where the actual thing happens underwater washes all the lubrication away. Ensuing discomfort for all involved.”
17.”Your parents’ bedroom. This is an onion comment. Many layers.”
18. “I lost mine in the back of my boyfriend’s mom’s minivan in the middle of the woods. That definitely wasn’t my ideal spot lol.”
19. “I’d have to say it’s gotta be a car for the ladies… bloody hymen breaks all over the seats. For the men, it’s gotta be near a beehive or hornets’ nest… one wrong move, stroke, etc, and you’ll be given a different definition of blue balls.”
20. “Lost mine in a storm drain at a public park. We chose that over the large, and lockable bathrooms. Teenagers are smart aren’t they.”
So much to take not of.
Read more: 20 Sexual Lessons Everyone Should Know About, You’re Welcome.