Deciphering your sexual orientation isn’t as straight and narrow a path as society likes to paint it out to be. It can get confusing out there. And there’s nothing wrong with that. Perhaps, this Reddit thread where people have shared how they realised their sexual orientation might offer some more clarity or a sense of comfort to you, too.

Here, take a look:

1. “I meet a guy who’s attractive, I say congrats, I meet a girl who’s attractive and I want to get her number.”


2. “I can absolutely think a man is attractive, but that attraction doesn’t trigger the same response as an attractive woman.


3. “I saw Selma Hayek. And my brain shut down.”


4. “I kissed a girl and I didn’t like it.”


5. “I knew I was straight my entire life, but the first time I actually felt something was when Teenage Dream by Katy Perry came out. I was probably 7 or 8 and when I saw the music video on MTV, I instantly knew from then on that I liked women, no question about it.


6. “At 15, all my friends constantly talked about their crushes on our male classmates or their favorite male rock star. I was constantly thinking about my teacher, who was a woman. My thoughts were never physical; they were about mundane things. So I tried to convince myself I wasn’t gay. But I knew I couldn’t talk about my feelings. One day in class I was sitting on the floor with some other students and the teacher randomly put her hand on the top of my head. I felt like I was going to faint. The infatuation lasted a couple of years. If I saw her walk by all the way across the cafeteria I would be in a good mood the rest of the day.


7. “The thought of dating a girl has never crossed my mind and completely turns me off. Have never looked at a girl in public/ that I have been friends with, and felt any sort of desire to be with them romantically/ sexually. But I definitely find girls attractive and have fantasized about what it would be like to be with a girl sexually. Never have felt a strong enough desire to act on it though.


8. “Everyone else seemed to throw around terms like ‘hot,’ and their fantasies seemed to revolve around, y’know, sex. Yet mine were always of people whom I genuinely enjoyed spending time with. Everyone, even close friends of mine, misunderstood my desires, which… if that’s how they were conditioned to think thanks to everyone else, makes a lot of sense, though it definitely still annoyed me at the time.

In fact, I couldn’t, and still can’t think of a single point in my life where I’d dreamt of having sex with someone. In some cases, it seemed to be implied, dreams where I’d have kids, that kind of thing – but the act itself was always either ignored or glossed over.


9. “I remember when learning about sex ed, in my own thoughts, I was like why do we need to know this? Nobody is having kids. Might as well learn about colonising Mars or the Moon as well.

I really thought everybody was like that and just lied about finding people sexy and the like. I can understand someone being pretty, but it’s the exact same feeling when seeing a sunset, art, or listening to great music or seeing a great movie.”


10. “The nakedness of a woman, is a vision of God.”


11. “Looked at a hot girl, boner. Looked at a hot guy, boner. That’s pretty easy boner math.”


12. “I accepted that I like women pretty quickly, but it was far harder for me to accept that I DIDN’T like men. I don’t know why but apparently that’s pretty common with lesbians. Compulsory heterosexuality (look it up) is a bitch.


13. “I just knew as a young girl that I really liked boys. I had two older sisters and I loved it when they’d invite their boyfriends over! I would bother them and ask them questions.


14. “I can tolerate sex with a guy, it’s not bad but I rarely finish. But with a woman? Whole different thing. I actually physically and mentally enjoy it on every level. I’m also drawn to physical affection with women outside of sex. I want to hold their hand and run my fingers through their hair.”


15. “I like basically everything, especially if it’s more feminine, and I like looking a bit more feminine, so I am a femboy, who likes femboys and women primarily.”


Which of these did you find most relatable?