One thing every desi kid can relate to is extended family members and relatives placing random expectations on their shoulders.
Sadly, having boundaries is an alien concept for many Indian relatives which is why this tweet by Anubha is so relatable! In it, she has asked netizens about about the unsolicited “benchmarks” relatives have set for them.
Ladies (men can also answer),— Anubha (@ahbunaa) April 21, 2022
Besides forcing you to get married and makes TWO babies immediately, what are the other “benchmarks” that Indian relatives set for you?
From losing post pregnancy weight to becoming a doctor or devoting their entire lives to their in-laws, here are all the unreasonable expectations netizens revealed their “well meaning” rishtedaars set for them:
Be a “good” wife, daughter, daughter-in-law, mother (and all other roles). Put everyone and their neighbor ahead of yourself because women “sacrifice”. Respect everything patriarchy says you should. That’s all; very simple expectations.— Malavika Datar (@mdatar) April 21, 2022
Somehow go to Amreeka. Buy a new house. Buy a car. Go on an international vacation. This Shit depends one’s community, location, cast, religion, domicile, ethnicity, age, family background, friend’s crap, sibling’s shit, cousin’s shit, MIL’s unfulfilled dreams, Father’s guidance.— !deasingh (@ideasingh) April 21, 2022
Own a house.— Nakko Pucho Kya Hua (@MadelkarVijay) April 21, 2022
For instance this. If someone does not want to do a maternity photoshoot, they simply don’t want to do it. Respect it, please!
“Why you not doing maternity photoshoot? Xyz did – I’ll show you pics, they looked fabulous. These moments won’t come back again. You need to make memories”. 🤷♀️— Amrithaa S Punjabi (@aspunjabi) April 21, 2022
'Take care' of your husband.— Gorguntepalya Grinch (@Numb_Skull) April 21, 2022
Way back in 2003 or 04. One of my cousin was working for Samsung. In arranged marriage proposal, a girl rejected him saying he isn’t working for Infosys 😂😂— Nagendra Shastry (@ShastryNagendra) April 21, 2022
Job and clear loan 🙁 kill all dreams.— Faulty India (@FaultyIndia) April 21, 2022
look “pretty” 24*7 and smile and talk to everyone like you have no worries in the world— 🌺 Abhijnā 🌺 (@ravaeidli) April 22, 2022
They want me to be social.— शिवम् मिश्र: (@Madhupurkahu) April 21, 2022
‘Stay in lousy marriages,’ I think we’ve all heard of this one. At the end of the day, it’s nobody else’s call but the person who is in a troubled marriage to decide whether to leave it or not.
Stay with in laws,adjust for all idiosyncrasies, stay in lousy marriages even if being abused, not speak about emotional labour, don’t be ambitious but be very successful at work ,be present for all of children’s pursuits and never have mental breakdowns or get diabetes. Phew!— Dr Chitra Selvan (@ChitraEndocrine) April 21, 2022
Post Pregnancy Weight Loss.— Rani (@hippierani) April 21, 2022
Take care of your inlaws family while having 2kids and working for home paying bills…— Annasaaru🍛 (@atiiiiisundari) April 21, 2022
Become a Doctor or an Engineer.— Venkatesha Prasanna (@JvPrasanna) April 21, 2022
Buying a car.— Mumbai Kannadiga (@MumbaiKannadiga) April 21, 2022
(Apparently because it will be useful for them whenever they visit.)
“Going abroad”— Abhiram R (@abhicantdraw) April 21, 2022
Uff. Maybe we should send a broadcast text to all our relatives about our boundaries and life decisions, so that they understand it’s not their life, but OURS.