The big day of love is around the corner, people. And let's face it - even though a lot of us are smart enough not to buy into the ridiculous carnival of mush that is everything Valentine's Day - it's kind of fun to mock-participate in the pristine holiday of romance and do it with someone you love!

Well we've collected the cleverest, cutest, funniest of Valentine's Day cards out there meant for couples that get sarcasm more than they get romance.


The TV-crazed couple that fights over the remote a lot will understand.

Source: Julie Ann Art

For the ones who have their life's priorities straight.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Let them know you love them in spite of everything.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Celebrate the truth of your glorious union.

Source: Julie Ann Art

And tell them what their presence means to you.

Source: Stylist

You are, after all, not everyone's cup of tea.

Source: Etsy

Or just celebrate something else altogether!

Source: Stylist

But celebrate in a calm fashion. F**king calm.

Source: Stylist

Let them know how crazy they make you. Like insane.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Or you could ignore the day and celebrate avocados instead.

Source: Stylist

All that pressure to be cheesy!

Source: Stylist

When you actually just confusedly love-hate the day.

Source: Stylist

Cherish the things you have in common with your loved one.

Source: Julie Ann Art

And the fact that they obviously hate the stupid V-Day crap just as much as you do.

Source: Stylist

Tell them they're the only one for you.

Source: Julie Ann Art

And what about them you adore so much.

Source: Stylist

Let 'em know you'd always be there if they needed you. For certain specific things.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Your utterly special someone from Tinder the bar nearby.

Source: Stylist

Movie buffs have feelings too.

Source: Trend Hunter

Or you could just be... Direct. Movie buffs or not.

Source: Stylist

Remind them of all the things you like to do together.

Source: Stylist

First they stole your heart, and now the other stuff.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Tell 'em how much they mean to you. Be very specific.

Source: Stylist

And if you both are kinda anti-V-Day...

Source: My Modern Met

Kinda sorta just hanging out? There are cards for you too.

Source: Stylist

Tell them what you love about them. And what you don't.

Source: Etsy

Honesty, sometimes makes for the best Valentine's Day cards.

Source: Stylist

Make up a metaphor they'd get. A metaphor of luuurve.

Source: Stylist

And thank them for all they do for you.

Source: Julie Ann Art

'Cause this day is all about grand gestures. And sex. It's also largely about sex.

Source: Trend Hunter

Tell your loved one they're right on top of your list. Right below the dog, though.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Everything you do for them.

Source: Etsy

The worlds you'd give up for them.

Source: Trend Hunter

All just to do the little things you love doing together.

Source: Stylist

Even though...

Source: Stylist

Waiting for an answer? Go with a multiple-choice question.

Source: Stylist

If you're a lady with a special lady-love, tell her what's on your mind.

Source: Julie Ann Art

'Cause admit it, you know how disgusting you two are.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Might as well give 'em a card with the truth in it.

Source: Property Of Jack

Y'know, and be very, very clear.

Source: Julie Ann Art

Get your love some star-power, if you will. Get it some Mike Tyth'on!

Source: Etsy

Unless you think your love is enough. Just about, barely enough.

Source: Etsy

Pick a card... From the heart.

Source: Etsy

And tell your lover you think of them in your most special moments.

Source: Etsy

'Cause Valentine's Day May be full of surprises, but Valentine's Night not so much. *wink*

Source: Etsy


We hope you find yourself the perfect card. There's literally everything out there. Y'know what my card-dashian will read? "Kan-ye be my Valentine?"

BOOM. *mic drop*