We've all been there - sipping our favourite drink, appreciating the relaxing of the sinews, the liberation of the mind, the freeing of the senses, and then it hits. The sudden change from everything chill to everything shit. You get that familiar feeling in the pit of your gut, you think 'oh crap' and you hightail it to the loo to purge all the masala fries and chicken lollies you've been hitting through the night.
If you're sick of the sickness, here's a few ways to avoid letting it get to you in the first place.
1. Drink water before, during and after your drinking sesh
Try alternating every alcoholic drink with a glass of water, it keeps you from getting dehydrated and prevents nausea. Don't chug through liters at a go though, or you'll be projectile barfing your face off.
2. Limit the number of drinks you consume in an hour
Pacing yourself while drinking is pretty tough, considering short term memory loss is at an all time high. You could set up a dedicated reminder on your phone to beat you into submission, or just train yourself to not be such a fuckin' alcoholic. Either works.
3. Eat before and during your drinking scene
Most definitely line your stomach with some carbs like rice, pasta or bread and also some fatty foods before hitting the bottle. Avocados, eggs and salmon is apparently the best combo in the biz. This slows the rate at which your system absorbs alcohol, and keeps your entire system working at primo buzz - flirting, dancing and being a boss rather than a drooling mess lying upside down in the corner.
4. Pop a few antacids a little while before your first drink
Over the counter antacids can do wonders for your oft-abused stomach. They reduce acidity and can really help with you not feeling that all too familiar bilial surge when you're 7 drinks down.
5. Have some ginger or elaichi to calm that tender tummy
Chew on a piece of ginger or elaichi to take advantage of their powerful anti-nausea properties. You can even crush it up and put it in food or a drink. It'll soothe your stomach and hopefully keep the dry heaving to a minimum.
6. Chew a spoonful of fennel seeds (saunf)
Saunf is a wonder seed. It can help you come back from meals that feel like the point of no return, and it can also starkly reduce the nausea you feel when drinking alcohol.
7. Try not to mix drinks, we all know what happens when you do
This one's a no-brainer. Mixing 3 or more different kinds of drinks is just asking for trouble. If you have no choice however, be smart about it. Stick to beer for the first half and then to moderate amounts of something stronger later.
8. Chomp on a banana, it's a great rehydrating agent
Bananas are a great source of potassium and will also restore the right balance of electrolytes and water in your body very quickly. It's easy to swallow even when feeling sick, and is great at fighting against dehydration.
9. Don't eat oily food while drinking
Avoid deep fried and excessively oily food while drinking. Stick to light, filling snacks that don't put too much stress on your insides.
10. Try to avoid cheap liquor
Honestly, in India there's no way to know whether your alcohol's legit even if it's from the upper echelons. There's a lot of scammers making duplicate bottles all over the country. Regardless, cheap liquor can contain a lot of adulterants and other nasty shit that can really mess up your system.
11. Make smaller drinks with more mixers
This way your hand doesn't feel lonely without a drink, but you're still consuming a respectable amount of liquor.
12. Don't physically exert yourself too much
The dancing shoes come on after a couple of drinks, but after the 7th shot, the best thing you can do is not move too much, or face the consequences.
13. Avoid pairing sugary drinks with your alcohol
Sugar works to get you more wasted than you already are. They can disguise the strengths of the spirit you're drinking. Totally insidious!
14. Have a sit-down for a little while
Staying upright throughout makes you more active, and you end up reaching for the bar more. Having a bit of a sit down can help bring things back into perspective. Maybe even lead to some life-changing epiphanies!
15. Drink from a straight-sided glass
Researchers from the University of Bristol found that people who drink from glasses with straight sides, drink up to 60 per cent slower than those drinking from glasses with curved sides. So 'side' does matter.
16. Getting some fresh air can do a world of good
Just stepping outside of a crowded room can be a refreshing and very helpful change. It can help sober you up and reduce feelings of nausea. No one wants to sit cramped and sweaty with a bunch of drunks.
Desi vice, explained.