I have reached that age where the shaadi season does not excite me anymore. That’s not because I am worried about how to thwart that pados wali aunty’s persistent question of when I am going to get married, or because I’m unhappy seeing my friends and even my juniors tie the knot. I am happy they found someone. But the impending kharcha (financial and mental) that comes with attending a wedding is what makes me groan.

Deepika Padukone

Let’s start with the logistics of it, first. All of my friends live in different cities. So in order to attend one wedding, I’ll have to start planning much in advance with regard to my tickets (which are only getting costlier by the day), and the leave which hopefully my manager will approve. Clothes aren’t a problem because jaise-taise you can manage that.

Now if you fall into that category of lucky people who live in the same city as their friend, you will have to take an off from work or log in a half day at work. But also because you live in the same city, you will have to attend all the pre-wedding functions because dost ki shaadi hai! Also, how can we forget bachelor/bachelorette parties? Who would want to miss a bachelor party in Goa? I mean, I wouldn’t.

shaadi functions

Think about it, attending a wedding is tiresome in itself! Let’s think of a worst-case scenario. You live in Noida and the wedding is in Gurgaon. Ah, budget destination wedding! You will have to brave the traffic to reach the wedding. The thought of it makes me shudder. You need to prepare yourself mentally to be able to take this journey. If that’s not all, you also need to think about what gift you are going to give to the newlyweds.

Now imagine you have to do this almost every week because suddenly everyone you know has decided that this year and this month is the perfect time to marry! Are you going to attend all these weddings? Or will you skip some? And what acceptable excuse will you conjure to tell them that you are not coming?

Now when you reach the venue thak-haar ke, you are just too tired to dance or do anything. You just want a plate of starters, have some booze, and chill. But hey don’t you forget that you need to take the same long AF journey again in order to get back home.

shaadi kharcha

I know, I know… I am sounding like that whiny relative at every wedding who does nothing but sits in one corner and complains about things. But it is what it is, I cannot help it.

Coming to my ultimate problem. I am an introvert and it would be a classic deer-caught-in-headlights moment for me if the people with whom I thought I would spend time at the wedding don’t show up! Ab main kya karoon? Am I supposed to indulge in small talk with people? Now that I think of it, marriage isn’t scary. The thought of attending one is much scarier.

You are getting married, it’s fine. Go ahead but think also about my kharcha, no?