The moment you’ve all been waiting for is finally here! After a two-year-long hiatus, the government made the righteous call to take the high road and end its cold war with the social media app that pioneered the genre of cringe-chic. India’s favourite timepass, TikTok, is back with a bang.

The controversial decision comes after a troupe of MPs were caught red-handed escaping to the loo to choreograph a dance on Kacha Badam during a paramount Parliament session on petrol prices.

The Chinese military intelligence issued a formal acclamation of the announcement as they gear up to illegally mine the data of over 200 million TikTok users in India. 

Ecstatic Indians are rejoicing in celebration by recreating the American Tide-Pod challenge, spicing it up with a desi twist: munching on Mortein PowerBooster coils. The nationwide trend quickly went viral, being shared over 1 billion times and devoured the braincells of half the youth population.

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However, not all are happy with the comeback. Bollywood actress, Kangana Ranaut announced a year long vow of silence in protest.

Meanwhile, an AajTak exposé caught a groundbreaking innovation in the world of technology. Capitalist robot, Mark Zuckerberg can now emote! It was found destitute on the streets of Silicon Valley with what resembled human tears after its hardware incurred an all-systems failure trying to calculate the losses Instagram would face given TikTok’s return to the Indian Market. 

It’s not all sunshine and roses for the short-video app. As it picks up the pieces from its lengthy absence, it now faces a gruelling new challenge. An independent survey conducted by someone revealed that the teenage talent pool has decreased by 50% as Indians were forced into menial undertakings such as concentrating on their studies to fill the TikTok void. Only time will tell if TikTok revives its old glory or gets displaced by trivial substitutes such as education or a life. 

If you thought this news is too good to be true, you are right. Happy April Fools Day. Please don’t eat Mortein. 

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