Whenever we hear of theft stories in the media, the location is either some prized location like a bank, a five-star hotel, or some business mogul’s house. But this theft took place in the most boring place in history – a post-production office.
The possession that was stolen, you ask? It was someone’s SHRIMP FRIED RICE. The audacity! This story is old but it deserves a comeback for those who may have missed it the first time. Because office politics, shrimp fried rice, and the perpetrator in the vicinity – they make up one helluva thriller.
Here’s what happened.
Comedian Zak Toscani shared a Twitter thread about his co-worker whose lunch had been stolen from the office fridge. Things escalated and the authorities allowed him to take a look at the CCTV recordings to identify the perpetrator. No matter how much you love your job, there are days when it gets boring and monotonous. For Zak, this wasn’t one of those days.
Getting your lunch stolen, IN THE OFFICE, is annoying. We are adults and it is expected of people to behave like one.
Anyway coming back to Zak’s story. The co-worker identified the person and he saw that the person didn’t even eat the rice. They took it out of the fridge and, simply, tossed it in the trash.
The co-worker was asked if he wanted to take the matter up but he didn’t want to create a furore over fried rice. The HR, then, dropped a company-wide email urging people not to steal lunches. However, the person sat just next to Zak. Just three feet away. And this is where the fun begins. The events that followed next have an Agatha Christie touch to them.
So Zak narrated that when the perpetrator viewed the e-mail, she loudly said, “woah. Someone stole a lunch? Who would do something like that?” The perpetrator points fingers? How convenient.
To which the co-worker responds, “well yea it’s not ok to throw someone’s food away.” The tension in the air is thick. OOF.
According to Zak’s tweets, the woman asked the co-worker if that shrimp fried rice was his lunch. After the co-worker replied in the affirmative, what she replied next proves her chaotic energy. She said, “why would you go to HR about that?” ABSOLUTELY ZERO REMORSE.
Fast forward to the next day. Zak ordered three plates of shrimp fried rice for lunch. He gave it to the woman. And she said, “I love shrimp fried rice.” Didn’t we tell you she runs on pure chaotic vibes?
This classic office drama was so much better than any movie plot. Zak didn’t tell us what happened next and he is at peace with the lost shrimp fried rice. We will never know why the woman tossed the lunch in the trash. This is, like, those ambiguous stories where the author ends the story abruptly.
But all in all, this incident proves that we need to guard our lunches in the corporate world. Guard it even more strongly than our jobs. Especially when it’s shrimp fried rice.