We’ve all grown up listening to things like, ‘shaadi do parivaaron ka milan hai’ – because well, Bollywood and society exists. When in fact, marriage is about celebrating two people who love each other. But it’s not as simple as it sounds, at least not for us desis. Marriage in our society is treated as something very crucial to life that makes it look like an obligation or anything other than love.
These stories of people who struggled to convince their families about marrying for love, is proof.
1. “I tried convincing my parents for 2 years. This almost made me lose my mental shit and I finally booked flight tickets to move to Bengaluru, and get married in court. Then they agreed. My father didn’t take part in the wedding, but my mother did.”
2. “I was in a relationship for 6+ years with college sweetheart, and we decided to get married. We broke the news to our respective parents. Hell broke lose on both sides to accept the fact of caste difference, veg vs non-veg. Took nice 2 years for things to fall in place. Such a roller coaster ride it was. We’re getting married this June with both the families convinced. They’re nice to each other and the marriage preparations are in full swing!”– preevins
3. “It was the hardest battle I had to win! 4 years of struggle, to a point that I was completely broken down! But in the end, we joined hands and yes there was a happily ever after.”
4. “Tried convincing my parents for a while. We belong to different communities/state and my parents were too adamant. We gave up on convincing our parents and got married in a temple.”– cray3
5. “They didn’t approve of our marriage but it was due to the whole BS of “log kya kahenge”. I told them to tell all the loved ones to fuck off, before I had to tell them myself. Also this was after I broke up the arranged marriage I stupidly got myself into, had to tell the girl my side of the story.”– Kil0gram
6. “Mine is inter-religion marriage, and my parents were against it. We love our parents, but we have to live our life with our partner. So if parents are not agreeing then go ahead marry your BF and register the marriage.
Once you have kids, parents will agree 👍.”– Anonymous
7. “Stop worrying about others. Life is short, spend it with someone you trust & love. I had similar issues, but I ploughed through – despite emotional blackmails and threats. I managed, because I was financially secure & didn’t depend on my parents.”
8. “Mine was a love marriage (got happily married 2.5 years ago). I told my parents about my relationship when I was already in it for 1.5 years, and it took me almost 1 year to convince them. Then there was the courtship period for 6 months. This was the hardest part of my life. After my parents and her parents agreed to our marriage, we didn’t have enough money (mine was an inter-caste and inter-state marriage and I was the first one in my family history to do so).”
9. “We had an inter-religion marriage. I was able to convince my family as they were open. But from my wife’s side, they were too conservative, and didn’t accept our love. So we finally decided to get married without their acceptance. After our marriage, they accepted me within a few months.”
10. “My parents were skeptical at first since we come from a conservative Tamil Brahmin family. I tried for years to convince them. One thing that concerned them the most was – how our culture will be followed in the future, since the girl I loved belonged to another religion. But once they met her, they were convinced that it was in my best interest, and things became smooth going forward. As far as the relatives are concerned, none of them judged my parents for agreeing and welcomed their decision open-heartedly.”– Anirudh
Marriage is literally about two people, and it’s time that society calms down a little bit.