Sex toys can help spice up your sex life, or be the perfect tool for individual pleasure. But sometimes, they can also be a source of embarrassment.
Like it happened for people on this Reddit thread, where using and/or having sex objects turned out to be a cause of mortification and at times, even horror:
I was sitting in my living room with several of my friends and we were all talking, when suddenly I see this purple blur bobbing through the middle of the room. I didn’t quite comprehend what I was seeing at first, so my friends got a good eye-full before I realized that my ferret was dragging one of my dildos across my living room…
I live in a dorm and share a bathroom with a floor of about 40 girls. I can’t exactly wash my sex toys in the sink so I just bring them into the shower with me and soap them up there. As you can imagine, dildos can get a little slippery when wet and one fateful evening, when someone was showering in the stall next to mine, I dropped a large purple dildo which proceeded to bounce into the adjacent stall and came to rest against some poor unsuspecting girl’s foot. I had to awkwardly ask for it back and she haphazardly kicked it across the floor back to my side.
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I was getting ready to board a train, but one of my pieces of luggage was too heavy. My mom grumbled and started rifling through my suitcase and pulled everything out. There was my gigantic, pink Rabbit. Her face turned red, and she looked at me with that angry mom look, and screeched, “What in the hell is THIS?” in the middle of a train station. There was this little old lady sitting right there. Most mortifying moment of my life. I was 19 at the time.
At the restaurant, my mom had a few too many margaritas and told me about the vibrator that my dad had gotten for her. She said she didn’t want it, it was still in the box, and would I be able to make use of it? I had no idea what to say to that, so I mumbled an ambiguous reply.
We went home. I took a nap. When I woke up there was a pink rabbit sitting next to my head on my pillow. It was a pretty surreal experience in all. I kept it, and we never spoke of the thing again.
I actually had a vibrator begin smoking, sparking and melting while I used it! No joke! It took me a little while to realize it because I was in college and was trying to muffle the buzzing sound under a blanket so my other house mates wouldn’t know. I will never opt for the cheaper knock off vibrator again.
My wife was rubbing her clit with her bullet while occasionally grazing my balls because she knows I like that. Suddenly, I felt a STAB in my scrot, and I flinched.
But I kept going because, hey, balls-deep in pussy. Just likely a weird human body twinge, right?
Then it happened again. Felt like a cold nail being slammed through my balls. It HURT. I stopped, because I had no idea what the fuck.
She kept going for a second, then frowned at me and said: “You okay?”
Before I could respond, a jolt hit her, and she nearly backflipped off the bed.
We threw that goddamn bullet away.
I, my sister, and my mom were in the kitchen when suddenly, my little 4-year-old brother comes sprinting in with the purple fleshlight, wobbling around like jello in his hands as he hit it on the wall a few times.
Mom, with a silent look of horror on her face, quickly snatched it from his hands and went away for a moment. Me and my sis exchanged glances, mumbling “Is that what I thought it was?”
Mom returns with an awkward smile, we respond with a laugh, and we haven’t spoken of it since!
I went to college and forgot my vibrator in its hiding spot (under the dresser in my room at home). I came home one weekend to discover my mom and brother had rearranged my room for some reason. That’s when I realized they had probably lifted the dresser to move it. As soon as I had a chance, I checked under the bottom drawer and my vibrator was gone – it had been placed in the middle drawer. THE HORROR.
I was about 20 years old and I had just moved back into my mom’s house. I was alone in the house for the first time in a while, so I decided to break out the vibrator and have a nude, porn blasting, day long masturbation session. About half way through my marathon, I smell something very similar to plastic burning. I looked down to discover, to my shock and terror, that my vibrator had caught on fire. I immediately stand up, hold the flaming vibrator above my head, and do a naked, screaming lap around the house like a fucking cartoon character. I finally had the wherewithal to throw the vibrator in the bathroom sink, just barely averting a crisis. Moral of the story: if you masturbate too much, you will burn your house down.
At my boyfriend’s parent’s house, I put the ben wa balls (little balls you put inside you and they rub against each other and heat up) inside me. After a couple of hours, it was time to take them out. One came out, but the other was stuck way up in there, right against my cervix. It wouldn’t come out. I couldn’t push it out, it was too slippery to get in there and grab it. I started to panic, and, of course, that tightened everything up even more! I kneeled on my boyfriend’s bed and he had his fingers up in there too, but we just couldn’t get it.
I was freaking out; I didn’t want to go to the hospital for such an embarrassing thing. Luckily, my boyfriend had some Valium, so I took a handful of them, and about 45 minutes later everything relaxed enough to slide that little guy out.
I was out drinking one night and came home at 2 am.
I heard this sound that sounded like my ceiling fan was going to explode or something.
I woke both my mother and father and had them exploring my room and the whole house, flipping on/off light switches, tightening light bulbs, etc.
I then crawled past my suitcase… and realized what the sound was. My vibrator had turned on and was rattling in my suitcase. The look of shock, embarrassment, and disappointment on my father’s face is forever etched in my brain.
I then went to bed and cried for 3 hours I was so embarrassed.
My fiance and I were playing with those little bullet vibrators and he stuck it inside me and went back to making out and while doing that he put his dick inside me with the vibrator still in me and it got stuck. So we spent 10 minutes trying to get it out of me. Finally, I got up and did some awkward squats and positions until I was able to get it out.
Needless to say, we never used that particular toy again.
I was visiting my older brother, who is gay and was living with his boyfriend at the time. Because I’m the type to not be able to sit still, and am constantly fiddling with stuff, I opened the door of a cabinet. Inside was a huge dildo with attached balls. I quickly shut the cabinet and pretended like I hadn’t seen anything.
I guess it isn’t that much a horror story, but one night we forgot to put away the vibe after we finished and I awoke the next morning to a child running it all across the dresser, saying happily “I’m cleaning!” Must have thought it was an electric toothbrush or something.
It’s all fun and games… until it isn’t!